Warp Zone

Its been almost 3 days since I texted her.

And its been 3min since I checked my hp.

Am I that unworthy?

Am I that dispensable..?

Allah... Grant me mercy pls..

Condolences

My neighbour's dad just passed away peacefully yesterday morning.

I miss that uncle who always says hello to me whenever im leaving to school.

The look on the children's faces. That empty void.

As I attended his wake, and closed my eyes to pay my respects, I realized two things:

1) We always take for granted the things that we have, only to regret them when the person that we care dies. Its a kind of loss (khusr), or utter loss, where you have so many things to say, but death does not permit you to say it, and thus, you are rendered in utter loss and loneliness.

2) Cancer is like a warning letter to say that your passport is near expiring date. Once you receive it, it will usually be at stage 4, and you will know where you will stand, and make preparations for death.

And all around me, their relatives and close friends cried in grief and remorse.

My time will come one day as well.

Guess I am outta time.

Random

I miss you, Yoko....

A Reason

I woke up with a dream about you.

The more I try to detach myself away from the present, the more intoxicated the love that is in my heart. However this time, the love does not make me go crazy.

It gives me reason.

Reason to work hard, to prepare myself to be a worthy man.

To be an honorable man.

This love that Allah gives me, it gives me strength instead of weakness. Before, whenever we argue and I felt insecure, the monster inside me awaken, and I went berserk.

This time, I felt longing. I feel life. I feel human. Again.

Suatu Masa

-For you, Yoko.

Bagaimanakan ku mula
Dan apakah kata-kata
Yang indah untuk diabadikan
Tiap wajah berkisah
Tiap madah bererti
Manakah ilhamku

Cahaya di matamu
Senyum di bibirmu
mengukir seribu tanda pertanyaan
Mungkinkah kau jua dalam kerinduan
Di saat begini aku merindukah

Berhelai-helai surat
Terbiar di depanku
Tak dapat aku utuskan
Ku ramas semua
Dan ku buangkan
Jauh dari pandangan

Lalu aku kesal
Ku kumpul semula
Tak dapat ku nyatakan apa yang ku rasa
Jika engkau tahu di dalam hatiku
Mungkinkah kau sahut jeritan batinku

Dengarkanlah panggilanku
Dengarkanlah lagu untukmu
Angin lalu kau sampaikan
Rasa rindu yang membara
Kepadanya

Warna-warna cintaku
Kian pudar bersama
Malam yang gelap gelita
Entahkan kau rasakan
Apa yang aku rasa
Atau kau tak endah

Tapi ku percaya
Semua telah tertulis
Dan niat suciku takkan disiakan
Dan di suatu masa
Di hari yang indah
Ku hulur tanganku
Lalu kau terima

Mystery

I tried moving to RP to do my assignment by myself.

Half way through, I decided that I can't.

As it turns out, I have never went to RP alone. Simply because, Yoko was there all the time, lending me her warm company.

So I went back home, hoping to Allah that He softens her heart.

When she told me she does not want to give hope, I refused to believe it so. Because....

Allah always provide hope.

"(Allah,) The Originator of the heavens and the earth. When He decrees a matter, He only says to it, "Be," and it is." (Al-Baqarah, 117).

There is always hope for those who seek it in His name.

And in this context, I seek refuge under His guidance and All-knowing, and Mercy and Strength, for I am just a creation trying his best to be a good servant. And that I pray, that Allah swt, the Bringer of Hope and the Destroyer of all Despair, will provide the both of us, the mending of ties (jabeer kul kaseer), and is given a chance to redeem myself.

I now see the Truth of my Desires. Indeed, Allah provides me with this test to open my heart to His Truth: To love Yoko with sincerity of His love. And automatically, all will fall into proper place. Respect, kindness, care, generosity, tender love, guarded eyes and nafs, and of course, love (al-hub) that is based on hayat (ha-hidup lawannya mati; God's attributes of Existence that surpasses all existences, and with that, the recognition of myself as His slave) and baqa' (ba-kekal, lawannya fana'; God's attributes of His existence that does not perish, eternal, everlasting, does not have a beginning or end).

And with that, the knowledge that Allah has the Will to do as He pleases, and that He can create everlasting love that has a beginning where Muslims who love each other surpasses through this life till the next, and is shown through kinship (syafa'ah from Brotherhood ties) and beyond Paradise (the final destination of Man where they embrace the ones that they love and enjoys eternal love).

Ya Latif fu ya Latif. Ya Allah, berikanlah daku peluang untuk menebus kesalahan aku, untuk menjadi seorang hamba yang patuh atas agamaMu, dan mencintainya atas pemberianMu...

Missing you

I played badminton today with my buddies. Apparently I felt something missing that's so prominent.

I know that Yoko loves playing badminton, and just now I could see from her eyes some form of disappointment.

If I would have been a good person who really takes good care of her, I would have been playing badminton with her in the same team and laughing and smashing and having fun.

Then I would sent her back feeling happy that she is happy.

And I saw her fb status and I know she is sad.

Allah, please send me help and mend what is broken for us. Please.

I love her with all my heart.

No one can be my Yoko. No one, oh Allah....

Looking back

As I was busily trying to record the song 'If I had a Gun' by Noel Gallagher, I stumbled upon pictures and videos of you.

Yoko's secret video that bore message 'I hope that when you saw this video, you will laugh or something' or those secret videos she naughtily record without me knowing it, when I look so stressed up studying. Or those simple video journals we made at the Macdonalds @BPP while having nice cinnamon melts. And there were those funny and sweet pictures we took from this Macbook.

It made me laugh. It made me smile. And it made my day. :)

I asked God to mend my heart. And everytime I see your face, it mends itself. Everytime I push you away from my thoughts, it gets torn apart. Is this the answer to my prayers, oh Allah? Is this loving her sincerely?

---

I was reading Surah Yasin and I saw this verse:

79. Say: (O Muhammad ) "He will give life to them Who created them for the first time! And He is the All-Knower of every creation!"

80. He, Who produces for you fire out of the green tree, when behold! You kindle therewith.

81. Is it not He, Who created the heavens and the earth Able to create the like of them? Yes, indeed! He is the All-Knowing Supreme Creator.

82. Verily, His Command, when He intends a thing, is only that He says to it, "Be!" and it is!

83. So Glorified is He and Exalted above all that they associate with Him, and in Whose Hands is the dominion of all things, and to Him you shall be returned.

Verse 81 shows that even if you try as much as you want to make something happen, you should ask Allah first, because He is All-knowing. And when He intends a thing to exist, He just need to make it happen, and it will happen. I was asking dad, what is the meaning of submission to Him. He says, to erase all thoughts that bind, and bind ourselves to Him. In Malay, he continued:

"Dia akan beri kepada sesiapa insan yang Dia suka. Dia suka kalau insanNya bermunajat, mengharap denganNya, berserah meminta pertolongan kepadaNya dengan bersungguh-sungguh. Atas belas kasihanNya, kita harus yakin bahawa Dia akan beri."

Aku hanya meminta ampun dan dedaun taubat kepada dosa-dosa yang telah aku lakukan selama aku hilang arahku. Aku akui bahawa diri ini lemah dan dangkal. Aku akui juga bahawa dahulu kala aku masih dibawah panjiNya, tetapi aku telah lemas dalam lautan nista. Ego diri, rasa diri benar dan haq, riak dan takabur, dan penyakit marah telah meresap dalam hatiku, dan selama setahun lebih lalu, ia telah berleluasa bagaikan kanser yang merebak, sampai ia menyakitkan orang lain. Ilmu yang ku timba, kerana tiada keikhlasan, hilang begitu sahaja.

I asked my mum, what is the way out of this mess. She simply said, "Solat Dhuha' and Tahajjud, jangan lepas al-Waqi'ah and Yasin tiap-tiap hari, dan telek diri. Kutuk diri. Dan sentiasa bermohon pada Allah keampunan."

Alhamdulillah, ada jalan keluar. :)

Regret and Loss

It has been 3 weeks since the day I lost someone precious to me. I could not narrate the pain that I feel in my heart. Is this what you felt back then, when I was being the most self-centered person that does not deserve your honour? By Allah, it is. It is the most devastating pain I have ever felt. Even more painful when my closed ones passed away. I felt so weak, physically and emotionally. I couldn't eat well. My weight decreased till 60kg. I stared at blank space most of the time at home. I kept looking at the phone, for a sign, for comfort, from someone that I hold so dear in my whole life.

I keep looking at the things that I did for you. I keep thinking that I am the best. I keep thinking that this is the right way, my way. I always think I should win. And in that, the one I that I love so dear, professed the very sentence that shook my whole world.

I asked God for help. And I gain some peace in me. I see reason now. I see myself foolish, dishonourable, treacherous, arrogant, temperament, self-centered, opiniative, judgemental and more. Is this how you bring me to the Right Path, Allah? If it is so, aku redha.... But please give me strength to face this..

I have some unspoken words that I can't say in front of you, to honour you. But perhaps, I would want to write it here, to express unspoken words.

I am sorry awak. From the bottom of my empty heart. On that Sunday, two days after the grieving news, I find strength and asked you whether you would want to accompany me study. At first I felt, are you out of your mind? It hurts, no? But I told Allah in my prayers, to guide me to answers that I need to seek. So you came. And there was this moment when you placed your head on the table and slept.

I cried watching you sleep. It wasn't a sad tear. It was a happy tear. To see you sleeping so peacefully. And suddenly, I saw flashbacks of you and I, that I feel so real to me. You were there when I first submitted my application to SIM. You where there protecting me when ppl shove unbearable words during FOC planning. You were there waiting patiently after my work, brought me cards of love, cookies made from those love. You wear beautiful clothes to make me smile. You were there in every part of my life. And to think that university life is the best phase of my existence, you are there all the time, without fail. You were there when I struggle to see strength in my studies. You were there to comfort my heart everytime I felt lonely. You were there when my parents and family show lackluster support on my education. You are there whenever I felt stress everytime I finish tuition. You were there when everyone shunned me aside. You stood strong in front of me, all arrows thrown on me, but you took it. And when I left that seat on Syura, you came crying to me after dealing with pain.. for me. You showered me love everytime I feel sad. You say, "its ok k awak... saya tetap sokong awak no matter what.. tomorrow is going to be a good day.. saya belanja ice cream k.." to me everytime i feel so down...

But I return it with anger. I judged your family and friends. I was so arrogant. so foolish. haish. I did zalim on you. I did zalim on you.... And I cannot forgive myself for the actions that I did. In the end, I did zalim on myself as well. And this is the retribution that I must face for the many zalims I did on you. You were not happy, because of this zalim. And I have failed. I am a failure. And I seek Allah's guidance and strenght.

I feel like wearing a rubbish bin on my head for the rest of my life.

As I type away my unspoken feelings for you, tears come streaming down. And through that moment of peace, when you slept on that table on Sunday, I had my answer:

I love you. I will always will. I saw sincerity in that love. I see that love. I feel that love. And for the first time in my life, I have acknowledged this love that we share, as real and true. And when I asked Allah in my heart, I whispered, "Is this the answer, oh Allah?" And then I felt peace. I felt love. I felt tremendous amount of love. The knowledge of Allah as the Sole Provider of my existence, bored down a single creation: my love for you, is by Allah's Grace. I love you, because of Allah. And now, I feel that deep inside your heart, in the subconscious realm of your soul, you still do. That you suppressed all of the pain, all by yourself, by Allah's grace, for the fear of the Devil that will conspire against the both of us. You sacrificed your emotions and feelings, to save us both. And in that moment, I feel love that I never felt before. A love like a light shining like the moon. It was you, who is the Gift from God, not me to you. It was you, who saved me from my foolishness. And Allah saved us both, through you.

And I have held bearing and strength, and I spoke to Allah, to be there with me in times where I feel lonely. You felt lonely because Allah was not in our love in many moments throughout our relationship. But I believe, that I know you also do, that there are moments where our love felt pure, connected.

Ya jabeer kul kaseer. Mend my heart. Mend her heart. Mend our hearts for you.

I see it True

The love of You

That spreads from the heavens and Earth.

Ya jabeer kul kaseer. Mend my heart. Mend her heart that's true.

Only to You we Return

Only to You we love

And protect us from the deviated path that will burn.

Ya jabeer kul kaseer. Mend my heart. Mend her heart that's true.

You fill my heart with light

You grant me the gift of Sun that is Bright

So shower us with mercy and forgiveness.

She is the woman that I love. And I love her because of Allah. And I leave the test of sincerity to Him. But my intentions will be corrected. It will be based on sincerity, on iman, on Islam, on Your Deen. Not on foolishness. I am lucky, to be granted a chance to redeem myself for Him. And awak, you will always be my moon. The light that shines, when all lights are out.

Hayya fi qulubinna.

Harap Maklum

Salam terhormat. As I am in the phase of setting up my own website, I will start to downsize this blog space in order to shift the whole thing and revetting certain posts to be transferred to my website.

As such, I won't be blogging here much. Reconstruction will commence after 1st week of May.

Thanks! :)

Time Lapse Videography of the Universe

The Mountain from Terje Sorgjerd on Vimeo.

It is interesting to ponder how feeble all of us are when we look at the sky.

I used to have this weird habit of placing my feet on the sky, only to feel scared afterwards. The thought of the sheer amount of space left on the balls of my feet would shake the living 24-year-old lights out of me.

Looking at the Milky Way, and the way the clouds swim like the waves crashing on rocks clearly signifies the realm that we live in are truly spectacular for those who think and reflect on how small we are- minuscule compared to the Universe. A tiny explosion of supernova near our solar system would probably sent us all to Level 7 Chernobyl disaster part 3.

If I were to smoke pipe and stare at the Milky Way, would I see strawberry fields?

Super Moon

Me and Yoko saw this magnificent red 'hunting' moon at woodlands en route to woodlands interchange.

Yoko kept commenting on how big and how beautiful it was.

I merely smiled and replied, "Who knows? There might be superman behind that moon pushing it towards us. And speaking of which, did you know that the speculators of Illuminati mentioned about their Grand Plan of sending UFOs and Aliens to attack Mother Earth in hopes of the world uniting against a common enemy?"

Talk about being smooth. :p

Today Yoko wore this red maroon headscarf, which kinda reminds me of the girl in my Coach frame on my work desk.

Talk about dejavu. :p

Needless to say, Yoko is my super red moon. Simply because, she wears red.

And she is super. :)

Man of the World

Al-Kindi mentioned about the harmony of music, the arrangement of mathematical cosmology that influences the human mind, soul and heart.

"It is not possible to enter the human heart without passing by the antechamber of the ears. The musical, measured subjects, emphasize what there is in the heart and reveal their beauties and defects."- Al-Ghazali, in Ihya ulum Ad-Din.

And the 'you' here is, well, me. :)

Disappointments

How do you define disappointment in laymen's terms? In my point of view, its simply whereby my expectations isn't met. Well, so how do you measure the level of credibility and justifiable an expectation can potentially be?

Well, it is perhaps a mixture of ethics, justice, and adab. Putting things in its proper place. Like putting appreciation in its place when you feel someone has helped you in major situations, or like putting a cup of coffee on the table and not on the floor. A human brain is located at the top not on my ass. So yeah, thats adab for ya.

It is disappointing if someone whom you expect to have understood your worldview did not meet that expectation. It is as if, you expect the person to run fast, knowing that the person can run fast, but due to some amount of emotional lag that dampen ones ability to perform aptly, the person, well, I would say didn't plausibly make it to my expectation list.

Im not an ardent admirer for perfection. Perfection does not belong to a creation. But we must however, try our best to make do with the things we have. That is adab. To rightfully accept our role as steward of this world, and though we may lack in many different ways, we try our best to make this world a better place to live in.

It all boils down to trust. When a person trust that the other could perform, it sort of create a self-prophecy cycle that enables one to do something for the sack of that trust. It is the ability to appreciate trust as an existence that manifest as beauty not in the eyes of the beholder, but beauty in the mind's eye of the beholder. Clearly there is a significant difference between the eye, and the mind's eye. The mind's eye is your worldview. The lens encompassing your perspective over REALITY.

Reality is a large word. If you ask Prof Naquib the definition of reality, he'd whallop your butt raw for asking the wrong questions. In fact, how can you define reality, when reality defines definition? Its like an apple defining life, when life itself defines and shapes our perspective of the apple, like how sunlight influences the colour of the apple to be red or green. So what exactly is reality in this context??

Well, for beginners, it starts with the people around you. Yes, these people around you are real, although some scientist might beg to differ as the people around you, so they claim, is a reflection of the electric signals running thru your brain, and thus, if they could distort the electric signal, the eye sees a different picture.

But surely we must look at a person beyond his appearance. What im trying to say, is to see a person beyond the eye. Using the mind's eye. To appreciate the living of that particular person, and do what you can to make the best out of it. In what way then?

Learn to be thankful. Accept the imbalances of the self and take it in your stride, and appreciate the realities around you. It is exceptionally important for one to be appreciative. Because if a person is not, well, that reality can simply be undone. I mean, God creates us for a reason right? That He alone is all-sustainable, everlasting, whereas we are short-lived, and weak.

It is best for you to reflect my friend. Before that particular reality ceased to exist.

Only God is the true reality that does not perish!

A Happy bird

Sometimes I wonder, when I dwell in the labyrinths of adab, and I see my buddies who have understood that concept but failed to reinforce it after the month of ramadhan left us, it saddens my heart.

It is ok to express certain things. But we must remember that there are certain things that are best left aside, and if there is a need, to not pursue it. It is like, you express that you like the apple on the NTUC shelve, but knowing that you have a lot of apples at home, you don't pursue the offer of buying it, less eating it of course.

Each individual is liable of his/her actions. But nevertheless, when it comes to the level where it involves other beings of life, and their feelings and certain emotional attachments, it is best to not discuss the hidden desire, to quell the forbidden desires of pursuing more than what you have. If two is not enough, it is best to contemplate on yourself and not do anything. Because every action you take, it'll lead to consequences that may sadden others. Perhaps we all should reconsider our thought-provoking statements, and that is a reminder for me too. :)

Selamat Hari Raya to my Family and friends, especially my flysunday who has been with me for more than a year, the child, the rose and the angel, the strawberries in the fields, the house that was meant for us to stay atop the rainbow peels, etc.

You make me feel happy. A happy bird. Happily tweeting its way to soar among the clouds, knowing, understanding, and most of all, BELIEVING in me that I will always go back, perched upon the petals of my lovely white rose, singing songs of songbirds and dust, and back again to my home in the sky.

The sky is where I truly belong. And my heart is where you truly belong. :) That is, my sincerity at its best.

And to this world, stop the Burn the Quran crap. You're not burning anything my friend. If you really want to burn, you gotta burn our hearts. Because what we memorise in our minds doesnt make our minds holding the holy book, but it is actually the heart that memorises them in its totality. Because the heart is knowledge-based. And the Quran is knowledge. So burning the book is like burning water. No matter how much fire you have, we always come down as rain.

Or worst, as happy birds.

The missing jigsaw piece

Its been ice ages since I blog. I find it abit of a chore to keep updating about myself, and having the sole objective of blogging lost among the updates. I mean, blogging is supposed to be a medium to express what I feel right? Hmm..

I can't sleep, so was in deep thoughts over some uncertain issues. Was rolling around listening to some music until it played a familiar piano piece that was long lost. It was farzanna's piano piece. So I decided to look back at my blog posts in hopes that I could find some answers in what I opined as 'contemplating on past actions'.

Saw this post dated way back in August 2007. It read, "Dont let him get hurt, if it has to be, i'd rather u lemme take his place.."

Suddenly I realised the missing jigsaw puzzle. I believe each and every one of us have different interpretations on sacrifices. But what astounded me was that this insan could pray to God and asked that I were to be safe, and if I werent, she'd rather be in my place. I mean, what the heck. I wouldn't do such a thing. Its painful. Why would someone share another's tragedy?

Such blind love. Thats the missing jigsaw puzzle.

bla bla

sometimes it is kinda scary to gulp in the truth that you are one of the kind, possibly one out of a million. I am very sure I can meet the rest of the 10 from the other ten million.

sometimes I just feel like the people around me couldn't careless of the realities that are happening, but perhaps they really mean it when they say 'ignorance is a bliss.'

sometimes I feel as though I am not giving enough, but to them, it is too much, but to me, it is never enough.

so whose fault is it?

My guess?

Only immatures would initiate the pointing-finger approach.

The Reduction of Faith to define 'Underclass'

Dr Yaacob Ibrahim mentioned in the news recently about the emergence of underclass Malay/Muslim group from the main community, citing "This is not Malay culture, this is a subculture". (CNA,04 January 2010, Analysis: National approach needed for underclass issue).

The question is: Is it true that the emergence of such underclass from the mainstream community a recent introduction, or a cause of accrual exploitation of the media, or is it a cause factor of the social paradigm shift in a post modern era?

During the CLF/TMSN meeting with various Malay Muslim undergraduates recently, many of us argued and brought across factors after factors that maybe the social indicators to redefine the terminology 'underclass' in our context. However, much to my dismay, few would bring across a much simpler tool to find the pin among the hay.

There were many factors most sociologists would use to redefine such a heavy term as 'underclass'. Some say it is the result of the lack of the social, cultural and economical capital of the self. Others used the term 'pathological demoralization' of the mind, or also known as the 'last mile barrier'- the psychological resistance that puts in an absence of any effect if given empowerment, resources, capitals, benefits etc. Some might be given as much as a thousand dollars, but still fail to bring itself out of the problem due to internal resistance to all forms of given welfare.

Some also might argue that 'underclass' can be seen as an Alternative Value System. It is whereby the mind chooses its state of comfort, in a way that even success might be seen as 'drinking a dozen of Heineken bottles at one go' as compared to earning large sums of money. The yardstick of success is hence viewed differently.

In addition, some introduced the 'deconstruction of empowerment'' whereby the environment, social pressures and fast-paced modernization left them socially immobile- unable to keep up with the upper segment of the society, they tend to accept their fate and not having the determination to achieve. Others say they lack help from the MMOs (Malay Muslim Organisations) due to certain policy fine prints and the lack of information with regards to social welfare.

However, in my opinion, it is a mere loss of adab in the society. Referring to the transcripts of Prof Syed Naquib Al-Attas, "I said of that it is the loss of adab. Adab is a reflection of wisdom, because this comes from the knowledge of the Prophets. It is not something that you receive from universities or even from knowledge. Because sometimes people have knowledge but no adab. Adab, the way i understood it, it is acting in conformity with justice. Justice is THE final virtue, justice is the culmination of all virtues."

He further elaborated:

As said in the Qur'an:

"Verily Allah commands that you should render back the trusts to those whom they are due (amanah); and that when you judge between men, you judge with justice..."

(Surah An-Nisa': 58)

There are 4 terms in this verse that is important.

1) That the verse is a command ('amr). And when you talk about command you talk about law. Law can only take place when people realise the commands and prohibitions and submit to it.

2) The people of authority are not leaders in legitimate power, but people that are mentioned in the Qur'an as Ulul 'Ilm (those with knowledge), Ulul Absar (those with vision), Ulul Albab (those who are in thinking). This can also mean just governments too.

3) Wisdom, which is the knowledge that tells you of the proper places of everything. Those who are given wisdom include the Prophets and the philosophers. Unfortunately some of the philosophers do not realize that wisdom comes from Allah s.w.t, thinking that wisdom comes from their own minds.

Everything has its own proper place. Things are established in its proper places in accordance to haqq which is reality and truth. Wisdom is therefore the methods of how to deal with these things, to put them into their proper places.

4) Adab is conformity with the knowledge of the proper places of things. And when this is carried out, the condition that results from this is justice. Therefore justice is the condition in which things are in their proper places.

It is in such truth that I must mentioned that the loss of adab of our society itself has degraded our society from the light of Allah SWT. It is the reduction of faith, clearly seen in the meeting, that I would boldly comment that the term 'underclass' can also mean:

"People who has experience a loss of adab in conformity with the knowledge of the proper places of things, in which the reduction of faith, the disenchantment of nature and the lack of knowledge with wisdom in dealing with issues creates a stagnant, or perhaps, a dedevelopmentation of social excellance."

Sadly, it also means it includes me, and the many people who deemed themselves as intellects, for they show 'tendencies to reduce faith and spiritual aspects' in our efforts to study this issue.

The community must realise that the Malay community is built upon the transcended revelation of Islam. Stretching from the historical revivalism of the Islamisation of the Malay Archipelago from Hinduism and animalism, and the integration of Arabic language in Malay Language (as seen from words dunia, akhirat, ruh, doa, taqwa etc); it is steadfast, deep rooted, firm and strong, in our Malay culture and language. Thus, Islam is the way of life of the Malay World. It remains as our worldview.

In the Quran, I believe many would find verses that shows how Allah SWT torture those who do mungkar (bad actions) and rewards those who do makruf (good actions). It is perhaps, in this 'amar makruf, nahi mungkar' that could be included in the redefinition of the underclass. Hence, according to Islam, it is simply, 'those who do bad deeds, and do not do good deeds' (amar mungkar, nahi makruf).

Do we include spiritual perspectives to solve this issue, or do we use spiritual aspects as our magnum opus in our spectacle to study the issue, or we simply shrug the 'religious connotations' to do favours to the sociological aspects of research? Or we simply dwell in the pool of secularism and act as though we are Gods- in control of our own actions and thoughts?

I shall end this note with a quote from Rene Descartes, French Philosopher- "Cogito Ergo Sum" or ‘I think therefore I am’.

Wallahualam bisawwab.

Suffah Study Circle 1

Dated on the 19.12.2009

Studying text pg 1 to 5, Islam and Secularism,

Prof Naquib Al-Attas

Prepared by Md Hazlami Bin Zawawi

Brief Introduction to the birth of Secularization

Secularization was viewed by Christian theologians in the early 19^th Century as a crisis. Islam in the 9^th Century brought about significant influences on the Western Culture and civilization, channeling the age of Reason as it leads to the European Enlightenment that stretches from the 17^th Century till the 19^th Century. It is in the dualism between Reason and Religion that spurred the birth of secularization. [1]

Before the introduction of Islam, the Europe world was shrouded by the darkness of the Church. Christian doctrines and theologies were determined by the Church, and thinkers that showed deviant behavior towards the established creed were decreed blasphemous which in turn usually resulting in their deaths. The coming of Islam, also known as Pax Islamica[2], paying particular attention to the city of Andalusia, gave rise to the exchange and the introduction of knowledge of science, philosophy, theology and more.

Western philosophers have anticipated the coming of reason where an age of ‘no God’ and ‘no religion’ is emancipated with such force. [3] When the European scholars were opened to the knowledge brought by Islam, the introduction of reason and advances in science caused the European scholars to reanalyze Christianity, trying in desperate to link reason with Christian doctrines and creed. Unfortunately, what they see was a religion that was flawed in many aspects, which is why Christianity is still unable to establish itself with science. They were baffled when they used reason to explain Christian theologies, and got confused over unexplained mysticism where orthodox Christians would simply rely on the ‘It is God’s will’- referring to God’s ultimate plan[4]. It is in these unexplained tragedies of events that created confusion among Christian philosophers, and thus, they were ascertained that secularization would take place very soon.

Henceforth, in the midst of such confusion and chaos of theology, epistemology and the uncertainty towards the reliability of the Bible as a Christian fundamental pillar of faith, the conflict between reason and Christianity gave rise to Secularism, or also known at present, as the Western Civilization.

Age Of Reason

The participation of Science of Reason- the epistemological process of thought through analytical observation and rationalism is known to stretch way back into ancient Greek, where Greek philosophy was introduced by Aristotle. Upon discovering that the relevance of Christianity is no longer felt amongst the people due to the advent of Secularism, and with the echoes of the Nietzschean cry that “God is Dead”- a direct interpretation that “Christianity is Dead”[5] spearheading secularism, Christianity reaches a breaking point. With that, Pope Paul VI (1963-1978) reformed Christianity, and therefore, Christianity as an entity begins to align itself with Secularism.[6] The Gospel was reinterpreted radically, and the image of Christianity is seen to be logical, appearing naturally into the picture of contemporary Western man. They began to include Christianity in Science, Medication, Governance etc, only emerging as a religion of mere belief[7]. Thus, Christianity becomes an impartial element to secularization and contemporary man, but also separated when it comes to governance and science etc.[8]

In view of such integration, Christian theologians accept the ‘ever-changing’ and ‘evolutionary’ grounds of thought. They visualize with regards to the tragedy they have experienced during the process of inducing rationalism with Christian doctrines back from the 17^th century till 19^th century a life that is consistently ever-changing. The process of change and constantly evolving became part of the evolutionary process of human history.[9] This idea of ‘change’ can be related to the story of Sisyphus.[10] With that, they reinterpret religion as ‘constantly changing’, imposing on Christian doctrines to ‘update and change’ in accordance to contemporary event, which is why we see the Bible constantly changing, having different versions of every era and event, to mark the reformation of Christianity as a religion aligned to the spirit of the times.[11]

Let us then study the components of the Western concept of Existence. As discussed in the Suffah circle, we have identified a few concepts that represents Western contemporary thought of existence. The concepts are:

Concept of God in the mind

They view themselves as an observer in this reality that is constantly changing. Being an observer, they view themselves, as individuals, as an existence too. When they observe a divine entity known as God, they describe God as a questionable existence. Thus, God becomes an imaginative belief[12]. Therefore, the term, ‘Cogito Ergo Sum’ used by Rene Descartes, a French philosopher (1596-1650) which is translated as ‘I think therefore I am’ is a reflection of man being their own Gods where the disenchantments of nature[13] frees man from its religious overtones, enabling man to act upon as it pleases in accordance to his needs and plans.

In conclusion, we learned in an intensive perspective, the historical process of Christianity, from a divine revelation brought by Jesus (Nabi Isa A.S), to the alteration of the divine revelation that made Jesus divine in the Congregation of Nicaea led by Roman Emperor Constantine, to the Dark age of Europe, and the introduction of the light of Islam that spurred the European Renaissance in the 12^th century, the rise of the Age of Reason that created uncertainty among the Christians which led to Secularization, to the reformed Christianity to align themselves with secularism stretching from the 17^th century till 19^th century, and how Christianity evolves itself to be the universal religion in contemporary times. May Allah guide us in our quest for siratul mustaqim. Amin.

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[1] Refer to footnote 4 of Islam and Secularism

[2] Also known as Astro-Asiatic Age of Discovery, whereby explorers such as Ibn Sina gave rise to the earliest global trading network that spreads from the East of Europe all the way to the Southeast Asia. See John M. Hobson (2004), The Eastern Origins of Western Civilisation, p. 29-30.

[3] Islam and Secularism p.2

[4] An example of such confusion would be explaining Jesus as a man and a manifestation of God. While some Christian intellectuals may argue that God has the power to manifest as a man as an interpretation for mankind to understand God’s religion so that mankind can connect themselves to something that they can observe and commune, it is also God’s attributes to not do so, for God has the attributes as written in “Prolegomena to the Metaphysics of Islam” by Prof Naquib ‘To acknowledge God as Lord (rabb) means to acknowledge Him as Absolute King (malik), Possessor and Owner (sahib), Ruler, Governer, Master, Creator, Cherisher, Sustainer” (p.63) In view of this, how can God be represented by a living man when God is the Creator? How can Jesus be Divine when Jesus is a form of creation (makhluk) whereas God is the Creator?

[5] Refer to Islam and Secularism p.2

[6] Referring to Islam and Secularism p.3 “They went so far as to assert events in the West, that secularization has its roots in biblical faith and is the fruit of the Gospel and, therefore, rather than oppose the secularizing process, Christianity must realistically welcome it as a process congenial to its true nature and purpose”

[7] A representation of love, tranquil, freedom, peace, fairness and equality.

[8] To be more detailed, it is also known that while Christians preserve religion as an entity of peace and virtue, technology and governance is also carried out based on contemporary events. Meaning to say, Christianity is seen as just a belief and not a way of life (concept of Ad-Din) which differs with Islam, where governance, science and technology are based on the divine revelations of the Quran and Hadith, and the knowledge of the ulamas. When it comes to beliefs and virtue, they refer to the Church. But when it comes to science and governance, they refer to contemporary ideas. It is in this synchronization of two absolutely conflicting ideas that greatly attributes to the confusion in liberal Muslims.

[9] Islam and Secularism, p.4 states “...as part of the irreversible process of ‘coming of age’, of ‘growing up’ to ‘maturity’ when they will have to ‘put away childish things’ and learn to have ‘the courage to be’”.

[10] Greek mythology, son of Aeolus and founder and king of Corinth. Renowned for his cunning, he was said to have outwitted even Death. For his disrespect to Zeus, he was condemned to eternal punishment in Tartarus. There he eternally pushed a heavy rock to the top of a steep hill, where it would always roll down again. The process of ‘pushing the rock up the hill and the rock falls, and pushing it back up’ depicts the ever constant changes that a man must face. Hence, a man sees ‘change’ as an act of nature.

[11] Refer to written assignments of Dr Wan Azhar Wan Ahmad, IKIM, under the subject ‘Islam and the Challenges of Secularism and Westernisation’ p4-6

[12] It is like describing a pink ponytail as a ‘horse that has wings, pink in colour and has a horn.’ But the question is, is it real? Is it in existence?

[13] Refer to Prolegomena to the Metaphysics of Islam, p.25. This term is used by German Sociologist Max Weber and is described as Prof Naquib as ‘one of the components of secularisation’.