She never came to spore.

I didnt even slp just to wait for a call or an sms saying that im here.

So now I think Im really stupid.

I got punk. Haha.

So back to my simple life. Hmm, where do I setat?

Ok, for nusrah's sake, i think i have sum explaining to do.

But I'll post abt wen the time is ryt. And hey, im never always emo, ok? If I am, I wun be the cheery guy who keeps laughing and talking all the time, just that like I say, ppl have their ups n downs, its always good to express ur feelings, as for me, I share it w ma fam, ma peeps, thru convo, post sajaks online, im just dat type of guy who express his feelings and never admits ma ego by saying, "Im a man, so I keep things to show that im tough!" Im cool w dat, but I love maself, and I respect maself, I love what im doing, I respect ppl, and diff ppl hv diff personalities. But every person is special in their own ways, have their own goals, dreams, and diff ways of expressing what they believe in.

Ma lil bro expresses his anger thru silat.

A friend of mine write songs to show what he thinks.

Basically, life is too great, but the importance of understanding what a person is going thru that counts.

Now thats human. But nowadays ppl lack this kinda stuff, dun u think so?

Look at Palestine.

Ppl know that the peeps there are suffering, but what we lack is the understanding of how sad they feel, the losses they suffer, and all the other crap. Ppl brush it off their minds, and continue living their lives in absolute oblivion. Singaporeans only care about how nice their car is, how to get rich, how to not get themselves fine. But it lacks the concern of an individual over another individual.

Sometimes we need a hero. But ppl always forget that in each and every one of us, there is a hero. And that hero lies in the conscious of our mind, to do the right thing, and the faith in the heart, that everyday we try and help others, even if we cannot, we think about them. Who knows, one day when we are suffering, ppl think about us, and that, my friend, is the key to unravel the secrets about life.

Have you ever wonder why you are in this world? Why you are born w perfect arms, beauty, great health, incredible mind?

And not like those who are born deaf, blind, w syndrome and stuff like that?

The society has grown rapidly. Now I have thoroughly understood what my father told me to think.

"Look at the clock. How come time is going clockwise, when you need anti-clockwise movement to go forward?"

Try and imagine yourselves facing a car that is going forward. From that angle, what do you concur from the direction of the wheels of the car that is going towards you?

Its going anti-clockwise.

As we salvage ourselves to the will of God on the holy grounds of Mecca, the pilgrims turn anti-clockwise around the Kaabah in search of God's mercy.

So are they moving forward or vice versa?

As the turn of time ticks away, society's paradigm shifts to certain death- its as though time is a ticking bomb. The term that I would use is 'moral genocide'. Ppl kill one another not defined as an act of killing, but thru their squared lifestyle; they thought that they are moving towards modernisation- a world of globalisation that would bring us closer to perfection. Perfection. But does modernisation allow young children to scold their mothers, and treat them as their slaves? Does modernisation bring us to 'perfection' when the very fundamental concept that was once idolised such as love, ethics, courage, honour- all that we adore and portray in movies and literature, that we use it as a means to bring us closer to History, all dissolved in the host of materialistic ways of making illusions called 'living in self denial'?

Life is cruel. That is a fact. But do not be swayed by humans who would say and share and impose that since life is hard, we make the better out of it. Enjoy, laugh about it, spend, enjoy, bal bla bla. But being individualistic about it doesnt give us the reason to live and die for.

Hendak mati di hujung kuku
Hendak berkubur di tapak tangan (excerpt from Gurindam Jiwa)

Our forefathers, old philosophers are the very few men and women who visionized the destruction of men at our age. Death is certain. But dying with a reason that I did what I could to see through my age, and that knowing deep in my heart, I have helped a few individuals along the way, thru simplistic norms and means, I would say, I love life.

I Love Life.

:)