Friends or Foes

Sometimes I wonder why I should be there for others when they are not there for me. I wonder how my feelings change from a sincere friendship to just yet another opportunistic attempt on my life. I wonder how my thoughts shaped the view of my fundamental core of friendship when it turns out people are just trying to use me as a tool, like say, only asking me or calling me or contacting me when there's a fucking sale in DFS. Or they just want someone to accompany them, let say, calling on the hp on my outgoing calls singing on the guitar to cheer people up. Or just simply for my calibre of 'saving the world.'

I feel like a prostitute. Maybe this is how those girls at Geylang feel. Fuck.

I wonder how it really feels to be like Peter Petrelli. He is dumb and naive, gullible and, yet again, proven to be a useful tool, but having a heart of gold, that doesn't minus off the negative character. In the book I read somewhere, they say people need STRONG people not NICE people. Well, fuck the book.

I will change my hp soon. I'll cut myself from the world. The world that likes to take opportunities off people. A world where all they need is just me and my stupid antics to say 'tomorrow is going to be ok yeah?'.

I will try to be selfish in my order. Be selfish to be so-called 'strong'.

Well, I guess im just a plain loser trying to find the truth about life and how it runs and am willing to share it to people but people just listen to it for conveniences, and then they just keep digging me like im some kind of a gold mine.

I have a word for all of this. You people want strong people? Go ahead. Please me.


The author is pissed at his inapt to lead a normal life. Sigh, here we go again.
He wishes to be somewhere leading a quiet hermit life.