-Songs Playing In My Head-
Im not okay, My Chemical Romance
Got my marksmen. (at last)
Haha, easy money, now with 200 bux in my savings, plus my pay, and handsomely indeed, some ppl still owe me like a few hundreds..
When I ORD i think I have quite some money haha!
I wanna work! I signed up with my dad selling this '4LIFE' product regarding transfer factor pills. This lil enzymes are responsible for the body knowing which foreign cells or molecules like viruses or cancer cells amongst the many other healthy cells, and impart this knowledge to the body system.
Did you know that drugs only either stimulate the body's internal defense system or reduce symptoms, but ultimately, it is the body defense system that is responsible for the cure?
Hence, the source of cure for any diseases or complication actually comes from the body itself. And this breakthrough has the answers to that.
I'll elaborate it more once Im free.
Anyways, i was hoping to find an 8-5 job, office job ard 6 per hour. And some extra payment for off duties. My brother got lobang- somewhere in singtel as data entry. Relax jack, can even listen to music while working. After that can go out cuz its at dhoby ghaut, near town!! Whee!
Haha, life is gonna be hell great after ORD. Though im gonna miss the folks back at 4SIR (except 'him').
2 more weeks and im off to lala land...
And he looks up to the sky, eyes emblazoned with the tiger in him. No fear. No pain. Never surrender. He tucks in his legs, pulling his hands to his chest, focusing on a happy moment, before he flungs himself high towards the sky, eyes fixed to the moon...
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Saturday, January 12, 2008
System gone wrong in the Home of The Apache
-Song Listening-
I DON'T LOVE YOU- MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE
Yesterday a disaster unfolds yet again, adding to the spate of horrendous moments that begins to take a toll on me. Poor Hazlami broke down in front of the abandoned 622 building, once a stronghold for the many reservists that came for their NS cycle.
Yet again I try to endure it, but this time the trust and pride got hurt too much.
When I graduated from SISPEC, wearing that chevron on my arms, with the green beret, knowing my posting to a capable operational unit (rather than slack incompetant tekong or 2PDF) called 4SIR, having taken the Specialist Creed with pride whilst the many voices that echoed that momentous day singing unitedly uncalled unchallenged by the road ahead, I surge forward, knowing that the responsibility that was bestowed upon me to take charge of REAL MEN of 6 in a section is going to be a tremendous job to do. I strive hard, without fail.
I, am a specialist of the Singapore Armed Forces.
-born a specialist, always a specialist.
With pride I lead.
-seriously, without pride a specialist cannot lead the men. Only with pride, knowing that no matter how superb your men are, im always one step ahead. And that's why when a fellow soldier of higher ranking doesn't like you, just because you aren't able to please him the way you always does (like you do your job very well when he gives you orders), all he needs to do to put you down is to take the pride away from you. Alot of specialist, when getting into such situation, they become like a men themselves. Easy. Just treat you like a men. Then just have no trust. Done. But no matter how hard 'he' tries, he cannot take this pride away. Wanna noe why? Keep reading.
I, excel in my field, ensure the discipline of my men, and their mission readiness.
-in order to have pride, you need to excel both in the field, and the disciplinary act on your men. In the army, the word 'ENSURE' can be a killer. the famous common word frequently used against us fellow specialist are, 'i assume, you assume, then who ensure?'. As a ground commander, we deal with ground orders, ground control. Planning is still part of our deal, though most of it comes from the officers, but sometimes their planning too cock up, cos the thing that differentiate us and them, is that we understand the men more than them. Thats a fact.
We are considered 'the facilitators' on the ground, making sure the duty is done. They plan, we act. That's it. So mobility is important to determine the facilitating factor in accordance to acting the orders on the field. I was taken away from my great use of mobility due to unforseen circumstances. However, being excellant in the field before, and yet ensuring the discipline of my men, im still able to put a struggle for my pride as a ground commander.
For example, during duty in Jurong Island, i never got a SINGLE extra. In fact, the last extra that I got was from taiwan, which was like, 9mths ago. Other commanders in my platoon get extra like water. Me on the other hand, I was firm. I told them my expectation before going for duty. Like how the LBV and weapon cannot take off, when resting the LBV weapon must be within 0.5m away from them and etc. Time to patrol, you go. Time for sentry, better not sleep. If sleepy, I be the one either take over them, or i wake up and talk with them so that they wun fall asleep. I put absolute zero percent on myself, and 100 for my men. When Fahmi got into alot of trouble smuggling cigarette, and yet got caught smoking in the tower while I was out for duty, I kept him alive. I fought his case, and all he got was 10 days in detention barrack. When Faiezad got injured, and he was confine for not participating in any training in the week, although he still help around in the admin sector, I promised him he will not be confine. If he follow me to do admin work, he will not be confine. So when 'he' confined my 2IC, i argued with him and OC and the outcome? "I confine myself, Faiezad will book out." That was my call. And there I was, sitting alone on the steps of my coyline, looking at him happy, appreciative, and stress free while he walked towards the gate.
More sacrifices n more i made for my men. Cover them, buy them food and have a small section 'makan' session in their bunk, etc.
Which 3rd Sgt in the battalion has ever pump a company before? I did. When they were late for breakfast, and I was the COS. I did more than others did.
Everything that was out of a section commander job scope, I did it before. I was the temporary MP for RSM when they did investigation of the missing round. I escort so many soldiers to DB. I was a liason personnel during the exercise with the Malaysians, picking up FIBUA equipment from 3SIR and had to talk with many CPTs and MAJs regarding such high tech equipment, then I was among the 3 SME for TES equipment, helping to zero hundreds of Malaysian's weapons, teaching them, translator for 'him' when 'he' was conducting a TES course, and I was translating all of it in Malay as best as I could. I was emcee during the ORD Parade of first year commanders. I made a battalion worth black box for night indication in less than 3 days. And more. Alot more. And now, all of it was lost just because of a personnel vendetta against me. How professional 'he' can be eh.
I, overcome adversity with my fighting spirit.
- I must admit, alot of specs have this. The extra gees. Ability to stand tall when all are tired. Pushing the men, but at heart, pushing yourself, but never yield. Even though i was injured, i went for the gruesome 15km tactical night walk, bashing and walking and climbing and sliding, with the pain and strain that made me chew 4 tablets of panadol in less than 6 hrs. Rabak, but still i complete it. And im proud to say, i NEVER fall out of any training before in my NS life. Never.
I, will defend Singapore, with my life.
-Im adamant about this. Alot of NSmen do not want to go to war. Even if they must, its not cause of the country, its for their families and friends. This is what is lacking in the younger generation- patriotism. The spirit to fight for the country. Its totally different if you say you have made Singapore home, and you will defend this country. They made it home cause the many good things that is here for us. But defending it? As a ground ppl, I don't think so. Which explains the level of commitment between regulars and NSF see.
The system went all wrong. And all that I did was lost all because of a single vendetta that I, and many others, think its very unprofessional. This company has lost yet again another loyal soldier. This company has yet again prove to the world that it doesn't have a 'HEART'. They have lost.
Me.
A quote from the mural boards of 'THE WALL OF PRIDE- APACHE', by CPL HAFIZ, PLATOON 1 SECT 2, 2IC.
"The system is dead. But the mind is still alive."
Think deep, gentleman.
Think.
And as I soar the Great Wind sweep me of my feet. Leaving me unbalanced, unchecked. I was lost. And a glimpse of the Old Stars lay before me.
Oh God, give me the guiding path and let the stars shine on.
I DON'T LOVE YOU- MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE
Yesterday a disaster unfolds yet again, adding to the spate of horrendous moments that begins to take a toll on me. Poor Hazlami broke down in front of the abandoned 622 building, once a stronghold for the many reservists that came for their NS cycle.
Yet again I try to endure it, but this time the trust and pride got hurt too much.
When I graduated from SISPEC, wearing that chevron on my arms, with the green beret, knowing my posting to a capable operational unit (rather than slack incompetant tekong or 2PDF) called 4SIR, having taken the Specialist Creed with pride whilst the many voices that echoed that momentous day singing unitedly uncalled unchallenged by the road ahead, I surge forward, knowing that the responsibility that was bestowed upon me to take charge of REAL MEN of 6 in a section is going to be a tremendous job to do. I strive hard, without fail.
I, am a specialist of the Singapore Armed Forces.
-born a specialist, always a specialist.
With pride I lead.
-seriously, without pride a specialist cannot lead the men. Only with pride, knowing that no matter how superb your men are, im always one step ahead. And that's why when a fellow soldier of higher ranking doesn't like you, just because you aren't able to please him the way you always does (like you do your job very well when he gives you orders), all he needs to do to put you down is to take the pride away from you. Alot of specialist, when getting into such situation, they become like a men themselves. Easy. Just treat you like a men. Then just have no trust. Done. But no matter how hard 'he' tries, he cannot take this pride away. Wanna noe why? Keep reading.
I, excel in my field, ensure the discipline of my men, and their mission readiness.
-in order to have pride, you need to excel both in the field, and the disciplinary act on your men. In the army, the word 'ENSURE' can be a killer. the famous common word frequently used against us fellow specialist are, 'i assume, you assume, then who ensure?'. As a ground commander, we deal with ground orders, ground control. Planning is still part of our deal, though most of it comes from the officers, but sometimes their planning too cock up, cos the thing that differentiate us and them, is that we understand the men more than them. Thats a fact.
We are considered 'the facilitators' on the ground, making sure the duty is done. They plan, we act. That's it. So mobility is important to determine the facilitating factor in accordance to acting the orders on the field. I was taken away from my great use of mobility due to unforseen circumstances. However, being excellant in the field before, and yet ensuring the discipline of my men, im still able to put a struggle for my pride as a ground commander.
For example, during duty in Jurong Island, i never got a SINGLE extra. In fact, the last extra that I got was from taiwan, which was like, 9mths ago. Other commanders in my platoon get extra like water. Me on the other hand, I was firm. I told them my expectation before going for duty. Like how the LBV and weapon cannot take off, when resting the LBV weapon must be within 0.5m away from them and etc. Time to patrol, you go. Time for sentry, better not sleep. If sleepy, I be the one either take over them, or i wake up and talk with them so that they wun fall asleep. I put absolute zero percent on myself, and 100 for my men. When Fahmi got into alot of trouble smuggling cigarette, and yet got caught smoking in the tower while I was out for duty, I kept him alive. I fought his case, and all he got was 10 days in detention barrack. When Faiezad got injured, and he was confine for not participating in any training in the week, although he still help around in the admin sector, I promised him he will not be confine. If he follow me to do admin work, he will not be confine. So when 'he' confined my 2IC, i argued with him and OC and the outcome? "I confine myself, Faiezad will book out." That was my call. And there I was, sitting alone on the steps of my coyline, looking at him happy, appreciative, and stress free while he walked towards the gate.
More sacrifices n more i made for my men. Cover them, buy them food and have a small section 'makan' session in their bunk, etc.
Which 3rd Sgt in the battalion has ever pump a company before? I did. When they were late for breakfast, and I was the COS. I did more than others did.
Everything that was out of a section commander job scope, I did it before. I was the temporary MP for RSM when they did investigation of the missing round. I escort so many soldiers to DB. I was a liason personnel during the exercise with the Malaysians, picking up FIBUA equipment from 3SIR and had to talk with many CPTs and MAJs regarding such high tech equipment, then I was among the 3 SME for TES equipment, helping to zero hundreds of Malaysian's weapons, teaching them, translator for 'him' when 'he' was conducting a TES course, and I was translating all of it in Malay as best as I could. I was emcee during the ORD Parade of first year commanders. I made a battalion worth black box for night indication in less than 3 days. And more. Alot more. And now, all of it was lost just because of a personnel vendetta against me. How professional 'he' can be eh.
I, overcome adversity with my fighting spirit.
- I must admit, alot of specs have this. The extra gees. Ability to stand tall when all are tired. Pushing the men, but at heart, pushing yourself, but never yield. Even though i was injured, i went for the gruesome 15km tactical night walk, bashing and walking and climbing and sliding, with the pain and strain that made me chew 4 tablets of panadol in less than 6 hrs. Rabak, but still i complete it. And im proud to say, i NEVER fall out of any training before in my NS life. Never.
I, will defend Singapore, with my life.
-Im adamant about this. Alot of NSmen do not want to go to war. Even if they must, its not cause of the country, its for their families and friends. This is what is lacking in the younger generation- patriotism. The spirit to fight for the country. Its totally different if you say you have made Singapore home, and you will defend this country. They made it home cause the many good things that is here for us. But defending it? As a ground ppl, I don't think so. Which explains the level of commitment between regulars and NSF see.
The system went all wrong. And all that I did was lost all because of a single vendetta that I, and many others, think its very unprofessional. This company has lost yet again another loyal soldier. This company has yet again prove to the world that it doesn't have a 'HEART'. They have lost.
Me.
A quote from the mural boards of 'THE WALL OF PRIDE- APACHE', by CPL HAFIZ, PLATOON 1 SECT 2, 2IC.
"The system is dead. But the mind is still alive."
Think deep, gentleman.
Think.
And as I soar the Great Wind sweep me of my feet. Leaving me unbalanced, unchecked. I was lost. And a glimpse of the Old Stars lay before me.
Oh God, give me the guiding path and let the stars shine on.
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
Im just so so sad.
As though my heart broke a thousand pieces. I tried so hard, but nothing happen. :(
And all odds were against me. All that was in my mind, was her health.
My love is her health.
Im preparing to get myself hurt.
Terlarut aku
Dalam kesendirian
Saat aku menyadari
Tiada lagi dirimu kini
Sampai kapankah
Aku mampu bertahan
Tertatih aku jalani
Semua kisah hidupku ini
Tak akan terganti
Setaip kenangan yg telah terukir
Yang terendap indah dan melekat di hati
Akankah berakhir
Semua kisah yang telah tercipta
Di dalam benak ku, dan di dalam asaku..
Dan sayap rajawali tumpas menghadap perkasa langit
Bagai diludah
Terjunam hunjam ia terbalik pitau ia tercampak
Namun ia sayu memikir tantang dia...
As though my heart broke a thousand pieces. I tried so hard, but nothing happen. :(
And all odds were against me. All that was in my mind, was her health.
My love is her health.
Im preparing to get myself hurt.
Terlarut aku
Dalam kesendirian
Saat aku menyadari
Tiada lagi dirimu kini
Sampai kapankah
Aku mampu bertahan
Tertatih aku jalani
Semua kisah hidupku ini
Tak akan terganti
Setaip kenangan yg telah terukir
Yang terendap indah dan melekat di hati
Akankah berakhir
Semua kisah yang telah tercipta
Di dalam benak ku, dan di dalam asaku..
Dan sayap rajawali tumpas menghadap perkasa langit
Bagai diludah
Terjunam hunjam ia terbalik pitau ia tercampak
Namun ia sayu memikir tantang dia...
Sunday, November 25, 2007
All i could see now is the destruction of my creative mp4 dat wen to bits all cause my lil bro 'forgets' to remove it from his pants wen he went for his rock climbing practice..
Whole lot of shit worth of 3 years music downloading in there.
Darn. Hurt me so much to see it go away. But its ok.
Instead of me scolding him, i kept my distance and cool, and my dad did my job, and i swear it i didnt tell him anything.
Guess he either dig it out from his guilty face, or he is just plain Master Jedi.
As I look back at my ol lakai shoe box that contains the most treasured items I have in my life, it was a major wake up call for me- why can't I put away this feeling of self attatchment to a material?
Though yes, alot of them have sentimental values, like for an instance, the creative muvo sportsm i still have them in my drawer, and it still working after 3 years of service.
And I save up like 2mths worth of school money just to buy it.
Cards, letters, gifts, pictures, receipts, movie tix (like the LOTR marathorn) somehow have their own special moments.
I live in a life of moments. Moments that take my breath away. Moments that keep me strong. Moments that make me smile or laugh, or sadness.
Then came a picture of sorts in my head. Its like, I cant help it but realise that I tend to put 'things'- like music, small stuffs like receipts and that- as a memory trigger. For example, I hear this song called, "Hold on- Jet" and it reminded me of that time I sat at the seats of the stadium in AJC, looking over NYP from afar, after a training, it was the day after my birthday, first year, and the celebration was very sad. That time I was realli facing probs w Aish, and my studies, and my mind was aching from the stress and the pain. And so i sat there thinkin back how simple life can be if I could just sit there and do nothing but see the world change from a far.
Yup. And there is this birthday card by Nasir- he gave me when I was in sec 4, nearing my prelims. Its this round circular card that when i read it, i have to turn and turn the card. Haha. Thats like one of the sweet ones i get from a guy. Oh ya, and tis cd from a local artist who passed away, his name was Aden, and the song, "I believe in you", bren gave it to me, and i still got the small post it bren put it on the cd cover.
Brings back good ol memories.
I use to live a very simple life. So simple. Go mosque. Come back home read book, seldom hangout w frens, always alone yet having alot of frens. I have dis habit, its still in me, but now its seldom, though i like taking a walk at the SOC ground haha. Its like, walking alone, looking at the sky and the trees, and just smiling and talking to myself. Im not that crazy u noe, but its more of like, a reflective opportunity for me to make myself happy, and to learn from it.
And the habit of how i would look in the mirror and tell myself to calm down when something bad happen.
Come to thing of it, I was a nice person. :)
Now look at me.
Ppl backstabbing me, frens lie and cheat, ppl not appreciating the many small efforts that i put in for them, and i noe, its both myself and their fault.
And they just vanish. Vanish like, POOF!!
Shhesh, talk about being selfish, ryt din?
Tsk3.
But i stand firm on my ground. And all the oath taking and swearing and promises. I can forgive.
But i cannot forget. Never.
Never.
Oh ya, another important thing. Thanks to my love dian, who went thru all my up n downs, n mean ALL of it. I appreciate everything u did, so so much. U truly are. e beacon of light in my heart. I love you sweetie =) thanks for everything..
Whole lot of shit worth of 3 years music downloading in there.
Darn. Hurt me so much to see it go away. But its ok.
Instead of me scolding him, i kept my distance and cool, and my dad did my job, and i swear it i didnt tell him anything.
Guess he either dig it out from his guilty face, or he is just plain Master Jedi.
As I look back at my ol lakai shoe box that contains the most treasured items I have in my life, it was a major wake up call for me- why can't I put away this feeling of self attatchment to a material?
Though yes, alot of them have sentimental values, like for an instance, the creative muvo sportsm i still have them in my drawer, and it still working after 3 years of service.
And I save up like 2mths worth of school money just to buy it.
Cards, letters, gifts, pictures, receipts, movie tix (like the LOTR marathorn) somehow have their own special moments.
I live in a life of moments. Moments that take my breath away. Moments that keep me strong. Moments that make me smile or laugh, or sadness.
Then came a picture of sorts in my head. Its like, I cant help it but realise that I tend to put 'things'- like music, small stuffs like receipts and that- as a memory trigger. For example, I hear this song called, "Hold on- Jet" and it reminded me of that time I sat at the seats of the stadium in AJC, looking over NYP from afar, after a training, it was the day after my birthday, first year, and the celebration was very sad. That time I was realli facing probs w Aish, and my studies, and my mind was aching from the stress and the pain. And so i sat there thinkin back how simple life can be if I could just sit there and do nothing but see the world change from a far.
Yup. And there is this birthday card by Nasir- he gave me when I was in sec 4, nearing my prelims. Its this round circular card that when i read it, i have to turn and turn the card. Haha. Thats like one of the sweet ones i get from a guy. Oh ya, and tis cd from a local artist who passed away, his name was Aden, and the song, "I believe in you", bren gave it to me, and i still got the small post it bren put it on the cd cover.
Brings back good ol memories.
I use to live a very simple life. So simple. Go mosque. Come back home read book, seldom hangout w frens, always alone yet having alot of frens. I have dis habit, its still in me, but now its seldom, though i like taking a walk at the SOC ground haha. Its like, walking alone, looking at the sky and the trees, and just smiling and talking to myself. Im not that crazy u noe, but its more of like, a reflective opportunity for me to make myself happy, and to learn from it.
And the habit of how i would look in the mirror and tell myself to calm down when something bad happen.
Come to thing of it, I was a nice person. :)
Now look at me.
Ppl backstabbing me, frens lie and cheat, ppl not appreciating the many small efforts that i put in for them, and i noe, its both myself and their fault.
And they just vanish. Vanish like, POOF!!
Shhesh, talk about being selfish, ryt din?
Tsk3.
But i stand firm on my ground. And all the oath taking and swearing and promises. I can forgive.
But i cannot forget. Never.
Never.
Oh ya, another important thing. Thanks to my love dian, who went thru all my up n downs, n mean ALL of it. I appreciate everything u did, so so much. U truly are. e beacon of light in my heart. I love you sweetie =) thanks for everything..
Friday, November 23, 2007
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Internet in the Army??
Haha, in my 2 years of service (or nearing) in the Army, I've never been to a place where u can use actual internet haha.
Hmm, so many things to say.
Its been very rough for the two of us. The 3rd Party issue came to an end when we manage to block her off, and with a couple of goodwill prayers, God will protect us from any black magic that hovers like an eagle eagerly watchful over its prey.
Ann Lim is over. Now comes the days of the Aftermath, and still I sense there is more to come till the final testiment. The final day that I'll go over there and end the physical barrier that is keeping us apart.
As from this story, and from the previous ones, I've learnt many.
1) Never put too much trust on others
2) Friends can either help you, or kill you
3) Have Faith only in God and blessing from your parents
4) Humans have many flaws and weaknesses
5) As shown in (4), humans tend to say 'I forgive you', but never forgiving
6) Humans at times of pressure show much reluctance to think in logic and are always overwhelmed by emotions that can even 'severe the unthinkable'
7) Love is never a protocol; it needs one
8) Understanding is inevitable without acceptance
9) Pain is only physical if we believe its physical
10) Woman are either tools of seduction, or warmth of comfort
Its like a washing machine ride for me, and now im still in the ripples of it, though approching the calmness, yet the irony it can approach to calamity.
But fear not for I have faith in the Lord and me.
Right now my only focus is farz's health. And her well-being.
Trying to juggle work family and personal stuff is like fighting in a quicksand; the more you move, the deeper you sink. And the irony?
Its not the weight that pulls you in, its the struggle.
So I cannot afford to panic nor letting the chaos break open. I must breathe. Breathe. And clear my mind.
So much hatred, so much anger, so much pain in me, and I either use to let i all out, or fret about it someday.
I now must face it like a man. Like a stalling tiger waiting to catch a glimpse of the blood that will drip. The shudder. The patience. The all-calmness. Waiting for the moment to grasp the opp not to be missed. Or else.
Haz, there is no else.
PS: I love you- so much
Haha, in my 2 years of service (or nearing) in the Army, I've never been to a place where u can use actual internet haha.
Hmm, so many things to say.
Its been very rough for the two of us. The 3rd Party issue came to an end when we manage to block her off, and with a couple of goodwill prayers, God will protect us from any black magic that hovers like an eagle eagerly watchful over its prey.
Ann Lim is over. Now comes the days of the Aftermath, and still I sense there is more to come till the final testiment. The final day that I'll go over there and end the physical barrier that is keeping us apart.
As from this story, and from the previous ones, I've learnt many.
1) Never put too much trust on others
2) Friends can either help you, or kill you
3) Have Faith only in God and blessing from your parents
4) Humans have many flaws and weaknesses
5) As shown in (4), humans tend to say 'I forgive you', but never forgiving
6) Humans at times of pressure show much reluctance to think in logic and are always overwhelmed by emotions that can even 'severe the unthinkable'
7) Love is never a protocol; it needs one
8) Understanding is inevitable without acceptance
9) Pain is only physical if we believe its physical
10) Woman are either tools of seduction, or warmth of comfort
Its like a washing machine ride for me, and now im still in the ripples of it, though approching the calmness, yet the irony it can approach to calamity.
But fear not for I have faith in the Lord and me.
Right now my only focus is farz's health. And her well-being.
Trying to juggle work family and personal stuff is like fighting in a quicksand; the more you move, the deeper you sink. And the irony?
Its not the weight that pulls you in, its the struggle.
So I cannot afford to panic nor letting the chaos break open. I must breathe. Breathe. And clear my mind.
So much hatred, so much anger, so much pain in me, and I either use to let i all out, or fret about it someday.
I now must face it like a man. Like a stalling tiger waiting to catch a glimpse of the blood that will drip. The shudder. The patience. The all-calmness. Waiting for the moment to grasp the opp not to be missed. Or else.
Haz, there is no else.
PS: I love you- so much
Saturday, October 27, 2007
The distraught in my head.
The terror.
I feel so down.
I feel alone.
The pain of past haunts me yet again.
And now my pride and joy of being a commander is all gone like the wind- the injury that I had 2 mths back single-handedly killed my soul.
"Chao keng..." The look in those eyes of my men doubting my ability to lead again now my pride has gone. So far the only loyal one that never fades in my eyes, is just my beloved 2IC, my 2SAW Pte to be LCP Fahmi, my good friend Sufian MG Commander, 2SG Taufik my best buddy, and all time favourite till the end buddy Saifuddin who himself felt how i feel-he got himself injured during an exercise that fractured his right thumb.
Loyalty is getting slim. It is the pride of being a commander dat strived me to where i once have been. Now its all over.
Though i manage to capture the hearts of the clerks who would certainly help me to write a good testimonial for my ORD, and the few good soldiers who share the same fate as me- shunted aside though we fought many exercises for the company. Yet now its like game over for us. And im treated like not a commander now. But i braved the shores by still being there for my men, my platoon. Though i shunt myself away from my platoon mates, i seek shelter from the shadows, trying to close my eyes and tell myself that everything is going to be absolutely fine. I made plans, but not the right time yet to initiate. Now all i could do is wait, in a pool of disappointment, sadness.
I feel so used ryt now. Like a fucking prostitute. Not just at work. Even my best friend. Haish.
The anger in me is so huge. I let some of it out at farz, the fact that she couldnt calm my monster down and still never learnt the previous mistakes she has made and the many pacts and promises she have yet trying to uphold. I cannot blaim her for my own mistakes. It is I, and I alone. And so I know I have to solve this on my own.
As I venture in the darkness again, the old past haunts me. Its like dejavu- going through the motion of being used and taken advantaged of put me down to the deepest hallow.
I want to be brave. I need a friend. A friend that can pat me on the back and smile at me and say, hey, everything is going to be fine. Be strong.
I hate my encik. I have a plan to destroy him completely. He will know that messing around with his loyal soldier has its negative side to the situation.
Ryt now, i feel useless.
I need an instant, suprising shocking but happy cheering up ryt now.
(now that i say this, i wonder if anyone could bring me out for an ice cream)
I hate me. I hate. Hate. :((
The terror.
I feel so down.
I feel alone.
The pain of past haunts me yet again.
And now my pride and joy of being a commander is all gone like the wind- the injury that I had 2 mths back single-handedly killed my soul.
"Chao keng..." The look in those eyes of my men doubting my ability to lead again now my pride has gone. So far the only loyal one that never fades in my eyes, is just my beloved 2IC, my 2SAW Pte to be LCP Fahmi, my good friend Sufian MG Commander, 2SG Taufik my best buddy, and all time favourite till the end buddy Saifuddin who himself felt how i feel-he got himself injured during an exercise that fractured his right thumb.
Loyalty is getting slim. It is the pride of being a commander dat strived me to where i once have been. Now its all over.
Though i manage to capture the hearts of the clerks who would certainly help me to write a good testimonial for my ORD, and the few good soldiers who share the same fate as me- shunted aside though we fought many exercises for the company. Yet now its like game over for us. And im treated like not a commander now. But i braved the shores by still being there for my men, my platoon. Though i shunt myself away from my platoon mates, i seek shelter from the shadows, trying to close my eyes and tell myself that everything is going to be absolutely fine. I made plans, but not the right time yet to initiate. Now all i could do is wait, in a pool of disappointment, sadness.
I feel so used ryt now. Like a fucking prostitute. Not just at work. Even my best friend. Haish.
The anger in me is so huge. I let some of it out at farz, the fact that she couldnt calm my monster down and still never learnt the previous mistakes she has made and the many pacts and promises she have yet trying to uphold. I cannot blaim her for my own mistakes. It is I, and I alone. And so I know I have to solve this on my own.
As I venture in the darkness again, the old past haunts me. Its like dejavu- going through the motion of being used and taken advantaged of put me down to the deepest hallow.
I want to be brave. I need a friend. A friend that can pat me on the back and smile at me and say, hey, everything is going to be fine. Be strong.
I hate my encik. I have a plan to destroy him completely. He will know that messing around with his loyal soldier has its negative side to the situation.
Ryt now, i feel useless.
I need an instant, suprising shocking but happy cheering up ryt now.
(now that i say this, i wonder if anyone could bring me out for an ice cream)
I hate me. I hate. Hate. :((
help
Its coming back.. I could feel it.. Its been away for months.. Yea, the monster.. I could feel its coming, haunting me again.. I hate it when he went back to camp.. He kinda changed.. It was not like dis wen we were together for the months that he was home.. I could feel the difference.. He was that wadeva kinda man, albeit couldn't be bothered.. His words was sharp and cold.. I do feel terguris.. Perhaps its due to the probs he's facin at work.. Im tryin to be there for him.. I have been prayin that things will go well for him.. Tsk.. Its unlike the months he was at home.. I feel liberated.. We enjoyed each other's company, though we do have a few hiccups here and there.. But it was so blissful.. Till he went back.. N he went back to his old self.. Im trying hard to be there for him.. I knoe its hard, e probs he's facin in camp n all.. Yesterday, last nite was like gave me a synopsis.. Im beginning to feel and have the fear to face the monster again.. Its imminent coming.. Is it just me? Why can't i do wad he wants e to do.. Am i dat useless?.. Dat stupid?.. When things go wrong, i dunno how to react.. Dunno wad to say.. Dunno wad to do.. My mind suddenly feel like its empty.. The fear is there.. N im feelin scared.. Im feelin so useless rite now.... N i cant shake it away.. Oh God.... I won't fear if ur here wimme... =( Please dun let it happen... I pray n beseech u Almighty God.. Mama, help me pls?... I need u...
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Tak ku rasakan lagi
Hangatnya rasa rindu
Tak ku rasakan lagi
Indahnya hidup ini
Telah habis rasa
Cinta di Hati
Yang menyelimuti diri
Tak kan lagi belai lembut tubuhmu
Tak kan lagi sentuhan bibir manismu
Tak kan lagi satu di dalam dirimu
Ku merindumu........
Oh kasihku dengarlah seruanku
Oh pintaku jangan lupakan diriku
Jadikanku kisah manis dalam hidupmu
Kau kekasihku......
God, I miss her so ever so much..
Hari raya has been a good and bad exp for the both of us. But be without fear dian, for our ultimate goal is more than this..
You will recover, and I promise you I will go there and see you..
I will.. abang promise..
Oh Allah, protect her.. :)
Hangatnya rasa rindu
Tak ku rasakan lagi
Indahnya hidup ini
Telah habis rasa
Cinta di Hati
Yang menyelimuti diri
Tak kan lagi belai lembut tubuhmu
Tak kan lagi sentuhan bibir manismu
Tak kan lagi satu di dalam dirimu
Ku merindumu........
Oh kasihku dengarlah seruanku
Oh pintaku jangan lupakan diriku
Jadikanku kisah manis dalam hidupmu
Kau kekasihku......
God, I miss her so ever so much..
Hari raya has been a good and bad exp for the both of us. But be without fear dian, for our ultimate goal is more than this..
You will recover, and I promise you I will go there and see you..
I will.. abang promise..
Oh Allah, protect her.. :)
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Eid Fitr
Allahuakhbar.. Allahuakhbar.. Allahuakhbar..
Lailahailallahu Allahuakhbar.. Allahuakhbar Wallillah Ilhamd..
Allahuakhbar.. Allahuakhbar.. Allahuakhbar..
Allahuakhbar Kabirau Walhamdulillahikathirau Wasubahanallahibukratau Waasila..
Lailahailallah Hualaya'budu Ila Iya Humukhlisi Nalahuddin..
Walaukarihal Kafirun.. Lailahailallahhu ahda.. Sodaqowa'da.. Wanasarawa'abda..
Wa'ahazajundahu Waahzamalwahda..
Lailahaillahu Allahuakhbar.. Allahuakhbar Walilailhamd..
I woke up hearing the takhbir over the radio.. The day is finally here.. The holy month of Ramadhan has ended and Muslims are celebrating Eid Fitr.. Unlike others, i feel saddened and my heart feels heavy though its not the first time im celebrating Eid overseas.. This time round, i could really feel the difference.. Im saddened that Ramadhan is over.. Dunno why.. My Ramadhan was full of challenges.. There were times i couldnt fast cause i had to undergo treatment and hafta eat my medicines.. I feel sad that my Ramadhan has ended and knowing that i have not completed my fast.. The month of ibadah and atonement is over.. I pray that God has accepted the ibadah that i've done.. I pray that God will accept my din..
To my family, i would like to say my heartfelt thanks and appreciation for being there for me in this time of darkness.. I love you dad, mum, kak suz, kak ruz, abang arif, baby amir, baby amaar and lastly baby sheila.. You have brighten up my life.. Encouraging me to recover and be positive.. I will try to fight what im facing rite now..
Abang sayang.. Im sorry i cant celebrate Eid with you in Singapore.. I feel so alone here without you.. Im trying to be okae.. Im just so full of emotions now.. I miss you and love you sayang.. I know that you have done so much for me.. Praying in the middle of the night and reading the quran for me.. I love you so much sayang.. Though you can choose to live a life of your own, being with someone else who could be with you physically and yet we have stood strong for 7 months and insyallah more to come.. I cant express what im feeling for you.. If not for you abang, i think i wont be here anymore.. You gave me the strength and the will to carry on with life.. You have made my life complete.. God bless our love.. Abang, ampunkan ayang jikalau ada kesalahan andainya ayang tersinggung perasaan abang.. Sayang, send my regards to ur parents whom i haf regarded as my own, not forgetting abang hasanul, najiy and nasrun.. I love you and all..
Ya Allah, ampunkanlah dosa-dosa yang telah aku lakukan..
Ku memohon keampunanmu dengan tangan yang penuh dengan dosaku..
Aku mohon ampun atas segala kesalahan yang telah ku lakukan..
Ya Allah, maafkan aku kerna mengatakan kau kejam semasa kau mengambil kembali
Ibu kandungku Allahyarhama Siti Sarah Abdullah @ Elena Emtrud Wilheim Guderian..
Maafkan aku kerna mengatakan kau kejam pabila kau memberikan aku kesakitan..
Terimalah keampunanku Ya Allah..
Andainya dikau hanya menerima keampunan hanya dari insan yang suci
Apa pula nasibku aku ini yang kerdil lagi daif..
Hanya kepada dikau ku sembah dan ku pinta pertolongan..
Ya Allah, telah banyak dikau kurniakan aku..
Kepandaian dan kebijaksanaan sehingga aku mencapai Ijazah Darjah Utama..
Rezki yang meluas yang aku gunakan untuk menolong mereka yang miskin..
Keluarga dan sahabat yang selalu meyayangi aku..
Cintaku yang suci dengan insanmu bernama Mohammad Hazlami..
Tetapi kesemuanya ini bukan milikku Ya Allah..
Ia pemberian dikau.. Milik dikau..
Telah aku rasai nikmat kebijaksaan, rezki, kesayangan dan cinta
Andainya kau ingin mengambilnya dari ku, aku redha Ya Allah..
Andainya kau inginku kembali bersamamu, aku redha Ya Allah..
Hanya ku pohon doa restu dan keampunanmu Ya Allah..
Aku redha Ya Allah...
Dian love Hazlami.. So much.. Now and forever..
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Post Saddam Era.. How is Iraq now without Saddam?
December 29.. The date Saddam Hussein was sentenced to death? Firstly, i had a burning question in my mind.. And i think that each and every one of us should ask ourself..
First, should Saddam die? Let's weigh the justification of the death sentence.. The Vatican has even revealed that the Pope has condemned the death sentence given to the Iraqi court against Saddam Hussein.. The Pope reiterates that capital punishment such as death goes against the teachings of the Roman Catholic Church.. Pope Benedict XVI’s prelate for justice related issues and a former Vatican envoy to the United Nations, commented that Saddam Hussein’s execution would punish "a crime with another crime" and expressed hope that the sentence would not be carried out..
Iraq’s highest court rejected Saddam's Hussein’s death appeal for the massacre of 148 people in Dujail, in northern Iraq, in 1982. The court sentenced that the former president is to be hanged within 30 days.. Contrary to popular belief that the death sentence was motivated and influenced by the hawks in the White House who is hell bent in getting vengeance.. This doesnt mean that all its administration staffs shared the same belief..
Former US Attorney General Ramsey Clark denounced the Iraq Special Tribunal's death sentences against Saddam Hussein in a press conference.. General Ramsey Clark served on Saddam Hussein’s defense team during the trial.. He warned that ter consequences of executions will create a multiplier effect causing greater violence thus worsening the situation in Iraq.. Saddam Hussein and his defendants were held under American custody at Camp Cropper, an American military prison near the Baghdad airport.. General Ramsey Clark commented that if Saddam and his defendants were turned over to the Iraqi authorities, they would face torture and death.. It is without doubt that the nature of the trial is biased..
Iraqi Prime Minister Maliki has repeatedly said that Saddam's execution must take place within that year.. It seems that the Iraqi law provides mandatory death sentenc to be carried out within fifteen days of the final judgment.. There was no attempt to prove that the recent trial was anything other than a staged trial.. As General Ramsey Clark said, it represented "victor's injustice, victor's justice being an oxymoron." The implications of execution are simply dire.. The Pentagon announced that violence in Iraq was at an all time high prior to the death sentence.. General Ramsey Clark also compared on the parallels between Vietnam and Iraq.. What a contrast.. Is it because the war was ideologically different? Vietnam war was about fighting communism.. While Iraq was a war of masculine chest-beating ego war against a Christian nation to a Muslim country?
Saddam Hussein collaborated with the United States in launching the 1980 war with Iran.. But then Saddam being the ego person he is, never subjected Iraq as a puppet government of the US unlike the regimes of Jordan, Kuwait or Saudi Arabia.. Was Saddam hanged because he stood up to US? Many claim that the US occupation was illegal and had no authority to try or convict Saddam.. It was waged without the UN mandate.. Some argue that real trials for "crimes against humanity" would have the Bush administration officials and Pentagon Generals as the defendants..
To the indigenous people of Iraq who were terrorized and imprisoned by Saddam Hussein, hate is a mild word when asked how one feels towards Saddam Hussein.. Some simply cannot erase from the memory of terror.. The sheer horror when there was an unexpected knock on the door or an unknown telephone call.. The biggest lesson Saddam taught was the existence of evil. For those who live in democratic and free countries, the concept of evil has purpotedly ''gone".. Much of the world is unable to understand because they have never experienced sheer evil.. This was Saddam.. His face was everywhere possibly erected.. Be it in the walls, billboards or statues.. He was everywhere even in your dreams..
In a Friday sermon, a Shiite Imam at a mosque in the Shiite holy city of Najaf describes the execution of Saddam as God's gift to Iraqis.. He said that Saddam has killed millions of Iraqis in prisons and in wars with neighbouring countries.. The preacher also says the former Iraqi leader is responsible for mass graves, and prays that God will take revenge on Saddam.. But we got to understand the current standoff between the Shiite and Sunni sects.. Under Saddam who is a Sunni, the Shiites were oppressed.. Sunni was favoured though they were a minority.. Now, the Shiites suddenly rediscover their voice and naturally used their freedom of speech..
Human Rights Watch however has a different take.. They viewed that the Iraqi government should not implement the death sentence against Saddam Hussein, which was imposed after a deeply flawed trial for crimes against humanity.. It was first reported by an Iraq’s national security adviser that they should have conducted a thorough legal review of the verdict and then announced its findings.. Imposing the death penalty, indefensible in any case, is especially wrong after such unfair proceedings.. That a judicial decision was first announced by Iraq’s national security advisor underlines the political interference that marred Saddam Hussein’s trial..
The trial only builds the belief of the Iraqi Sunnis who loved Saddam that Saddam Hussein was not given a fair trial and that Saddam died as a matyr..
The United Nations opined that every appeal judgment taken up by the courts of law should be a lengthy and complex decision making process that requires careful study.. There were a number of concerns as to the fairness of the original trial, and there is a need to assure that these issues have been comprehensively addressed..
The Prime Minister of Italy Romano Prodi: "While I don't want to minimize the crimes committed by Saddam Hussein, and the ferocity with which he governed during his regime, and while respecting the autonomy and legitimacy of Iraq institutions, I must express the Italian government's, and my personal, firm opposition to the death sentence."
I would like to say that i envy those western nations who stood up against the US and differs their view from them.. It is just the opposite of what we Muslims perceived.. It is not necessarily true that all western christians plot together to subject the world under them.. Least, what the EU, UN has done was commendable.. But their hands were tied to stop the US adamant attitude towards Iraq..
Personally, I believe that Saddam Hussein did not receive a fair trial.. His execution is a war crime and an act of murder.. Why should I believe any of the claims made against Saddam Hussein when nearly every claim used to justify the invasion of Iraq have all proven to be false? There were no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.. Saddam Hussein never conspired with the al-Qaeda terrorists who planned the World Trade Center attacks.. Iraq was never a threat to America.. It is simply a weak nation after the economic embargoes that the UN Security Council imposed on.. Lastly, what threat does the US faced from Iraq? Its military though one of the largest in the Middle East is in shambles and incapable of defending itself.. Unlike its other neighbours such as those friendly to the US who has supremacy in military power and Iran who indigeneously build up its own modern armed forces.. Can you see this perceived threat that the US has protrayed to its Middle East allies? Who benefits in the end? The US of course.. I also do not believe that Americans who backed the war above and beyond the lies that justified the war really cared about freeing the Iraqi people.. The court established by the United States military occupation of Iraq is also illegal and has no jurisdiction to prosecute anyone. It’s a sham, so much so that everyone knew Saddam Hussein would be convicted and sentenced to death..
When the judge at the court expressed sympathies for Saddam Hussein, he was immediately removed, which also proves that the purpose of the court, like the purpose of the Iraq invasion, was never about justice or rights, but about politics.. Saddam Hussein should be prosecuted before the International Criminal Court in the Hague where other international leaders have been charged, prosecuted and convicted on the powerful foundation of the International Rule of Law.. Or, brought before an International Tribunal set up under the auspice of the United Nations as was Slobodan Milosevic..
Saddam Hussein was not sent to the Hague, nor was an International tribunal convened because Bush cannot guarantee a conviction or death sentence there.. It might also open questions about Bush’s conduct of inquiry in Iraq.. If Saddam Hussein can be prosecuted for quelling a rebellion against his regime, cannot President Bush therefore be prosecuted for violating international law? Why should American soldiers in Iraq face war crimes charges be held accountable but not Bush? I believe far more war crimes have been committed in Iraq, but we have only chosen to prosecute those that are unavoidable and clear for all to see.. What about the BlackWater Securities which is a private security agency that kills civilians in an apparent "misfire"? There is also one more legal issue that is being ignored by the court in Baghdad.. If we are to accept the assertions that the war in Iraq is legal, then Saddam Hussein SHOULD be a prisoner of war.. His murder is a violation of the Fourth Geneva Conventions, that we have already ignored in the US conduct in torturing and mistreatment other prisoners.. Regardless, sentencing Saddam Hussein to death is a violation of international law.. But killing him is an immoral act tantamount to murder.. All of these violated principles and laws may one day come back to haunt us as Americans..
The timing of the death sentence was also carried out in a stupid way.. It was done before the start of the Muslim holiday of Eid al-Adha.. The Iraqi officials have said that their government would be loath to carry out an execution during the Eid festival, and have suggested that it would not take place until the holiday ends next week.. Perhaps it was pressured by the US to hasten his death sentence.. According to Iraqi laws, the convicted person has the right to see family within 24 hours before the death sentence was carried out.. Saddam Hussein said good-bye to his two brothers.. This makes sense from a security perspective.. Hang Saddam before the Eid al-Adha holiday begins under the cover of darkness and then unexpectedly announce it at dawn..
Other than that.. If Saddam Hussein murdered civilians in 1982, then why is Donald Rumsfeld, representing President Reagan, shaked hands with Saddam in 1983? The Reagan administration and its special Middle East envoy, Donald Rumsfeld, did little to stop Iraq developing weapons of mass destruction in the 1980s, even though they knew Saddam Hussein was using chemical weapons "almost daily" against Iran..
BUT WHY THE DISCREPANCIES NOW?
US support for Baghdad during the Iran-Iraq war as a bulwark against Shi'ite militancy has been well known for some time, but using declassified government documents, the Washington Post provided details in 2002 about Mr Rumsfeld's role, and about the extent of the Reagan administration's knowledge of the use of chemical weapons.. Furthermore, in 1988, the Dow Chemical company sold $1.5m-worth (£930,000) of pesticides to Iraq despite suspicions they would be used for chemical warfare. Hyprocrisy at its best?
Saddam's death will only serve to polarize more moderate Muslims.. It will not make them fear the US, England or Israel even more so..
Islamic terrorists embrace death.. They do not fear it.. So who is the US punishing?
What distinguishes military from the Islamic terrorists that we fight is the military cherishes life.. Yes, in war the military can be more barbaric using pyschops as good if not better than the enemy by hanging blood dripping heads on wooden sticks.. But is it appropriate to place Saddam's head on a wooden stick then? Will video of his hanging decrease conflict or increase it in the Middle-East? If it is so, it backfired.. the video showed the deathmen tounting him, cursing him, being rough with him, even spitting at him.. This is not justice.. It is revenge and vengeance..
Isnt it better that Saddam died of a heart attack, AIDS, a stroke or other "natural causes" in jail.. It worked for Yasser Arafat, it could work for Saddam Hussein isnt?..
George?.. Tsk3.. You're a naughty naughty boy..
Hurhur.. Do i make a good defence lawyer? Do i?! Do i?! =p
Dian loves Hubby Haz and makes him proud! Muacks1!
First, should Saddam die? Let's weigh the justification of the death sentence.. The Vatican has even revealed that the Pope has condemned the death sentence given to the Iraqi court against Saddam Hussein.. The Pope reiterates that capital punishment such as death goes against the teachings of the Roman Catholic Church.. Pope Benedict XVI’s prelate for justice related issues and a former Vatican envoy to the United Nations, commented that Saddam Hussein’s execution would punish "a crime with another crime" and expressed hope that the sentence would not be carried out..
Iraq’s highest court rejected Saddam's Hussein’s death appeal for the massacre of 148 people in Dujail, in northern Iraq, in 1982. The court sentenced that the former president is to be hanged within 30 days.. Contrary to popular belief that the death sentence was motivated and influenced by the hawks in the White House who is hell bent in getting vengeance.. This doesnt mean that all its administration staffs shared the same belief..
Former US Attorney General Ramsey Clark denounced the Iraq Special Tribunal's death sentences against Saddam Hussein in a press conference.. General Ramsey Clark served on Saddam Hussein’s defense team during the trial.. He warned that ter consequences of executions will create a multiplier effect causing greater violence thus worsening the situation in Iraq.. Saddam Hussein and his defendants were held under American custody at Camp Cropper, an American military prison near the Baghdad airport.. General Ramsey Clark commented that if Saddam and his defendants were turned over to the Iraqi authorities, they would face torture and death.. It is without doubt that the nature of the trial is biased..
Iraqi Prime Minister Maliki has repeatedly said that Saddam's execution must take place within that year.. It seems that the Iraqi law provides mandatory death sentenc to be carried out within fifteen days of the final judgment.. There was no attempt to prove that the recent trial was anything other than a staged trial.. As General Ramsey Clark said, it represented "victor's injustice, victor's justice being an oxymoron." The implications of execution are simply dire.. The Pentagon announced that violence in Iraq was at an all time high prior to the death sentence.. General Ramsey Clark also compared on the parallels between Vietnam and Iraq.. What a contrast.. Is it because the war was ideologically different? Vietnam war was about fighting communism.. While Iraq was a war of masculine chest-beating ego war against a Christian nation to a Muslim country?
Saddam Hussein collaborated with the United States in launching the 1980 war with Iran.. But then Saddam being the ego person he is, never subjected Iraq as a puppet government of the US unlike the regimes of Jordan, Kuwait or Saudi Arabia.. Was Saddam hanged because he stood up to US? Many claim that the US occupation was illegal and had no authority to try or convict Saddam.. It was waged without the UN mandate.. Some argue that real trials for "crimes against humanity" would have the Bush administration officials and Pentagon Generals as the defendants..
To the indigenous people of Iraq who were terrorized and imprisoned by Saddam Hussein, hate is a mild word when asked how one feels towards Saddam Hussein.. Some simply cannot erase from the memory of terror.. The sheer horror when there was an unexpected knock on the door or an unknown telephone call.. The biggest lesson Saddam taught was the existence of evil. For those who live in democratic and free countries, the concept of evil has purpotedly ''gone".. Much of the world is unable to understand because they have never experienced sheer evil.. This was Saddam.. His face was everywhere possibly erected.. Be it in the walls, billboards or statues.. He was everywhere even in your dreams..
In a Friday sermon, a Shiite Imam at a mosque in the Shiite holy city of Najaf describes the execution of Saddam as God's gift to Iraqis.. He said that Saddam has killed millions of Iraqis in prisons and in wars with neighbouring countries.. The preacher also says the former Iraqi leader is responsible for mass graves, and prays that God will take revenge on Saddam.. But we got to understand the current standoff between the Shiite and Sunni sects.. Under Saddam who is a Sunni, the Shiites were oppressed.. Sunni was favoured though they were a minority.. Now, the Shiites suddenly rediscover their voice and naturally used their freedom of speech..
Human Rights Watch however has a different take.. They viewed that the Iraqi government should not implement the death sentence against Saddam Hussein, which was imposed after a deeply flawed trial for crimes against humanity.. It was first reported by an Iraq’s national security adviser that they should have conducted a thorough legal review of the verdict and then announced its findings.. Imposing the death penalty, indefensible in any case, is especially wrong after such unfair proceedings.. That a judicial decision was first announced by Iraq’s national security advisor underlines the political interference that marred Saddam Hussein’s trial..
The trial only builds the belief of the Iraqi Sunnis who loved Saddam that Saddam Hussein was not given a fair trial and that Saddam died as a matyr..
The United Nations opined that every appeal judgment taken up by the courts of law should be a lengthy and complex decision making process that requires careful study.. There were a number of concerns as to the fairness of the original trial, and there is a need to assure that these issues have been comprehensively addressed..
The Prime Minister of Italy Romano Prodi: "While I don't want to minimize the crimes committed by Saddam Hussein, and the ferocity with which he governed during his regime, and while respecting the autonomy and legitimacy of Iraq institutions, I must express the Italian government's, and my personal, firm opposition to the death sentence."
I would like to say that i envy those western nations who stood up against the US and differs their view from them.. It is just the opposite of what we Muslims perceived.. It is not necessarily true that all western christians plot together to subject the world under them.. Least, what the EU, UN has done was commendable.. But their hands were tied to stop the US adamant attitude towards Iraq..
Personally, I believe that Saddam Hussein did not receive a fair trial.. His execution is a war crime and an act of murder.. Why should I believe any of the claims made against Saddam Hussein when nearly every claim used to justify the invasion of Iraq have all proven to be false? There were no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq.. Saddam Hussein never conspired with the al-Qaeda terrorists who planned the World Trade Center attacks.. Iraq was never a threat to America.. It is simply a weak nation after the economic embargoes that the UN Security Council imposed on.. Lastly, what threat does the US faced from Iraq? Its military though one of the largest in the Middle East is in shambles and incapable of defending itself.. Unlike its other neighbours such as those friendly to the US who has supremacy in military power and Iran who indigeneously build up its own modern armed forces.. Can you see this perceived threat that the US has protrayed to its Middle East allies? Who benefits in the end? The US of course.. I also do not believe that Americans who backed the war above and beyond the lies that justified the war really cared about freeing the Iraqi people.. The court established by the United States military occupation of Iraq is also illegal and has no jurisdiction to prosecute anyone. It’s a sham, so much so that everyone knew Saddam Hussein would be convicted and sentenced to death..
When the judge at the court expressed sympathies for Saddam Hussein, he was immediately removed, which also proves that the purpose of the court, like the purpose of the Iraq invasion, was never about justice or rights, but about politics.. Saddam Hussein should be prosecuted before the International Criminal Court in the Hague where other international leaders have been charged, prosecuted and convicted on the powerful foundation of the International Rule of Law.. Or, brought before an International Tribunal set up under the auspice of the United Nations as was Slobodan Milosevic..
Saddam Hussein was not sent to the Hague, nor was an International tribunal convened because Bush cannot guarantee a conviction or death sentence there.. It might also open questions about Bush’s conduct of inquiry in Iraq.. If Saddam Hussein can be prosecuted for quelling a rebellion against his regime, cannot President Bush therefore be prosecuted for violating international law? Why should American soldiers in Iraq face war crimes charges be held accountable but not Bush? I believe far more war crimes have been committed in Iraq, but we have only chosen to prosecute those that are unavoidable and clear for all to see.. What about the BlackWater Securities which is a private security agency that kills civilians in an apparent "misfire"? There is also one more legal issue that is being ignored by the court in Baghdad.. If we are to accept the assertions that the war in Iraq is legal, then Saddam Hussein SHOULD be a prisoner of war.. His murder is a violation of the Fourth Geneva Conventions, that we have already ignored in the US conduct in torturing and mistreatment other prisoners.. Regardless, sentencing Saddam Hussein to death is a violation of international law.. But killing him is an immoral act tantamount to murder.. All of these violated principles and laws may one day come back to haunt us as Americans..
The timing of the death sentence was also carried out in a stupid way.. It was done before the start of the Muslim holiday of Eid al-Adha.. The Iraqi officials have said that their government would be loath to carry out an execution during the Eid festival, and have suggested that it would not take place until the holiday ends next week.. Perhaps it was pressured by the US to hasten his death sentence.. According to Iraqi laws, the convicted person has the right to see family within 24 hours before the death sentence was carried out.. Saddam Hussein said good-bye to his two brothers.. This makes sense from a security perspective.. Hang Saddam before the Eid al-Adha holiday begins under the cover of darkness and then unexpectedly announce it at dawn..
Other than that.. If Saddam Hussein murdered civilians in 1982, then why is Donald Rumsfeld, representing President Reagan, shaked hands with Saddam in 1983? The Reagan administration and its special Middle East envoy, Donald Rumsfeld, did little to stop Iraq developing weapons of mass destruction in the 1980s, even though they knew Saddam Hussein was using chemical weapons "almost daily" against Iran..
BUT WHY THE DISCREPANCIES NOW?
US support for Baghdad during the Iran-Iraq war as a bulwark against Shi'ite militancy has been well known for some time, but using declassified government documents, the Washington Post provided details in 2002 about Mr Rumsfeld's role, and about the extent of the Reagan administration's knowledge of the use of chemical weapons.. Furthermore, in 1988, the Dow Chemical company sold $1.5m-worth (£930,000) of pesticides to Iraq despite suspicions they would be used for chemical warfare. Hyprocrisy at its best?
Saddam's death will only serve to polarize more moderate Muslims.. It will not make them fear the US, England or Israel even more so..
Islamic terrorists embrace death.. They do not fear it.. So who is the US punishing?
What distinguishes military from the Islamic terrorists that we fight is the military cherishes life.. Yes, in war the military can be more barbaric using pyschops as good if not better than the enemy by hanging blood dripping heads on wooden sticks.. But is it appropriate to place Saddam's head on a wooden stick then? Will video of his hanging decrease conflict or increase it in the Middle-East? If it is so, it backfired.. the video showed the deathmen tounting him, cursing him, being rough with him, even spitting at him.. This is not justice.. It is revenge and vengeance..
Isnt it better that Saddam died of a heart attack, AIDS, a stroke or other "natural causes" in jail.. It worked for Yasser Arafat, it could work for Saddam Hussein isnt?..
George?.. Tsk3.. You're a naughty naughty boy..
Hurhur.. Do i make a good defence lawyer? Do i?! Do i?! =p
Dian loves Hubby Haz and makes him proud! Muacks1!
Sunday, September 30, 2007
US Presidential Election 2008
Do you know that fourty percent of Americans have never lived when there wasn't a Bush or a Clinton in the White House? You get what im trying to say? You see, the Bush and the Clinton family are the most influential political families of the United States. The Bush belonged to the GOP Republican party while the Clintons are with the Democrats. In the coming US Presidential Election, Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton (Bill Clinton's wife) is hoping to take another four or eight more years of "Clinton" era. As it is, she is increasingly becoming more favourable as the Democrats main candidate and by God, her political war chest is pulling in huge donations for her presidential campaign. So are we gonna have to see a Bush-Clinton-Bush presidential pattern which has already held sway for nearly two decades?
The influence and dominance of the two families in the US Presidential races is unprecedented. (The closest comparisons are the father-son presidencies of John Adams and John Quincy Adams, whose single terms were separated by 24 years, and the presidencies of fifth cousins Theodore Roosevelt and Franklin Roosevelt, whose collective 20 years as President were separated by a quarter-century. Assuming Senator Hillary Clinton were to be elected in the coming elections and manage to get herself re-elected for a second term, the Americans could just be facing 28 years in a row with the same two families governing the United States. If we were to add the former President George Bush Senior's terms as vice president, that would mean a 36 years straight with either a Bush or Clinton in the White House.
Hence for 116 million Americans, there has never been a time when there wasn't a Bush or Clinton in the White House, either as president or vice president. But then, does a nation of 303 million people really have only two families qualified to run the White House? To be their President? But well, there does seem to be concerns about the possibility of giving "the two dynasties" another four or eight years. Is this what democracy is? Surely i dont think this is what democracy means. Wouldnt it be fundamentally healthier if we broadened the zone of candidates who could make it to the top? But this seems to be impossible, since the Clintons and Bushes have built up strong "brand" recognition for their names. Just as the Kennedys did in an age of promise cut short by assassination, making it harder for newcomer wannabes to compete for the poilitical presidential race.
How long could this dynastic dynamic play itself out? If this is bound to continue, i think its best that the Americans and the world keeps an eye on both the Bush-Clinton childrens. For now, there's always presidential brother Jeb Bush, the former governor of Florida. His oldest son, George P. Bush, is considered likely to carry the family's political tradition into the next generation.
What say you for if there's a possibilty of a Bush-Bush ticket for 2012? Ouch...
Dian_Farzanna loves Hubby Haz.. Muacks! =)
The influence and dominance of the two families in the US Presidential races is unprecedented. (The closest comparisons are the father-son presidencies of John Adams and John Quincy Adams, whose single terms were separated by 24 years, and the presidencies of fifth cousins Theodore Roosevelt and Franklin Roosevelt, whose collective 20 years as President were separated by a quarter-century. Assuming Senator Hillary Clinton were to be elected in the coming elections and manage to get herself re-elected for a second term, the Americans could just be facing 28 years in a row with the same two families governing the United States. If we were to add the former President George Bush Senior's terms as vice president, that would mean a 36 years straight with either a Bush or Clinton in the White House.
Hence for 116 million Americans, there has never been a time when there wasn't a Bush or Clinton in the White House, either as president or vice president. But then, does a nation of 303 million people really have only two families qualified to run the White House? To be their President? But well, there does seem to be concerns about the possibility of giving "the two dynasties" another four or eight years. Is this what democracy is? Surely i dont think this is what democracy means. Wouldnt it be fundamentally healthier if we broadened the zone of candidates who could make it to the top? But this seems to be impossible, since the Clintons and Bushes have built up strong "brand" recognition for their names. Just as the Kennedys did in an age of promise cut short by assassination, making it harder for newcomer wannabes to compete for the poilitical presidential race.
How long could this dynastic dynamic play itself out? If this is bound to continue, i think its best that the Americans and the world keeps an eye on both the Bush-Clinton childrens. For now, there's always presidential brother Jeb Bush, the former governor of Florida. His oldest son, George P. Bush, is considered likely to carry the family's political tradition into the next generation.
What say you for if there's a possibilty of a Bush-Bush ticket for 2012? Ouch...
Dian_Farzanna loves Hubby Haz.. Muacks! =)
A Relationship Guide - By Md Hazlami
I begin with the words, "In the name of God, the Most gracious, Most merciful."
Relationships can be very tough. Socio-habits of the human has always proved to have certain natural characteristics, which means to say the phrase ,"Go with the flow" is inevitably true. Humans were born to socialise, expanding its social circle to full potential. With reasons like political prowess, economical benefits, personal gain n etc, humans are bound to face such sooner or later in life. No matter how they try to run away from the inevitable, it is by nature that we would someday have this thought of settling down and start a family.
Being independant or the excuse to remain a single status is a mere concept of running away from commitments, phobias, stories of the past and etc. But even so, though they might feel independance is equal to liberation- the freedom to many close-knitted commitments and sorts- the fact still remain. How long do you want to wait?
In my life, I have seen many relationships crumble, and even experience it for myself. The excruciating pain, cuppled by the sudden lost of a special friend, with many reasons that'll just hurt you more, the anxiety that can bring you to the verge of self-destruction or even death. However, by studying the past, we learn. Humans and the past bear constant co-relationship that enables man to understand. Man cannot learn without making mistakes. The use of two atomic bombs proved man then that the use of such weapons of mass destruction is so violent and the need for diplomatic resolution is immediate. That war is costly. Such demonstrates the ability of man to grasp the hidden knowledge of God. Thou I must admit while some men are learnt, few fail to see the concept or patterns that intertwines the very balance of nature itself.
I see life as a balance. A universal pattern. A constructive idealistic form, yet subtle, viscous. And in order to understand life, these patterns need to be known. And learning the past helps in making such anomilies.
A relationship is a like a house with many pillars. Pillars represent foundations, and each foundation stands on roots of factors. Love is the key to opening the house. Home deco is the interesting things that spices it up- beautifies the love that we share.
Love is simple. Yet sophisticated. How is it so?
Love is a word. Love for God, family, religion, special ones, friends, nature, humans. Love therefore isnt a subset- its a full circle, and inside it are the balances of life we must appreciate. Each love is important. We cannot give full love to a person, for it would unbalance the balance. Loving yourself is the key to loving God, thus from there lies the pattern. Henceforth, loving thyself is the ultimate love that everyone must achieve.
Loving thyself is not being selfish, more rather understanding how important are you to the balance of life, to the family that bore you, to the friends that accompanied you. With understanding comes the natural love that acts as a light in us, an Eldar star that shines in times of darkness and crisis. With such comes acceptance, or the muslim term we use, redha,
things that comes into our way- obstacles or thorns in the journey towards loving the One God- won't affect us thoroughly. Instead, we accept, or if not, we learn to. Learning is the first step, its like a baby trying to walk on its two feet. Balancing is hard, but with lots of perseverance, determination, and luck, the baby finally walks.
Loving thyself, hence, is a major constructive idea to the path of acceptance, in which hence the root of all love. Learning yourself, respecting your body, mind and soul, is relevant in our journey to understand the fulfillments of Love.
PS: I love you dian. :)
Relationships can be very tough. Socio-habits of the human has always proved to have certain natural characteristics, which means to say the phrase ,"Go with the flow" is inevitably true. Humans were born to socialise, expanding its social circle to full potential. With reasons like political prowess, economical benefits, personal gain n etc, humans are bound to face such sooner or later in life. No matter how they try to run away from the inevitable, it is by nature that we would someday have this thought of settling down and start a family.
Being independant or the excuse to remain a single status is a mere concept of running away from commitments, phobias, stories of the past and etc. But even so, though they might feel independance is equal to liberation- the freedom to many close-knitted commitments and sorts- the fact still remain. How long do you want to wait?
In my life, I have seen many relationships crumble, and even experience it for myself. The excruciating pain, cuppled by the sudden lost of a special friend, with many reasons that'll just hurt you more, the anxiety that can bring you to the verge of self-destruction or even death. However, by studying the past, we learn. Humans and the past bear constant co-relationship that enables man to understand. Man cannot learn without making mistakes. The use of two atomic bombs proved man then that the use of such weapons of mass destruction is so violent and the need for diplomatic resolution is immediate. That war is costly. Such demonstrates the ability of man to grasp the hidden knowledge of God. Thou I must admit while some men are learnt, few fail to see the concept or patterns that intertwines the very balance of nature itself.
I see life as a balance. A universal pattern. A constructive idealistic form, yet subtle, viscous. And in order to understand life, these patterns need to be known. And learning the past helps in making such anomilies.
A relationship is a like a house with many pillars. Pillars represent foundations, and each foundation stands on roots of factors. Love is the key to opening the house. Home deco is the interesting things that spices it up- beautifies the love that we share.
Love is simple. Yet sophisticated. How is it so?
Love is a word. Love for God, family, religion, special ones, friends, nature, humans. Love therefore isnt a subset- its a full circle, and inside it are the balances of life we must appreciate. Each love is important. We cannot give full love to a person, for it would unbalance the balance. Loving yourself is the key to loving God, thus from there lies the pattern. Henceforth, loving thyself is the ultimate love that everyone must achieve.
Loving thyself is not being selfish, more rather understanding how important are you to the balance of life, to the family that bore you, to the friends that accompanied you. With understanding comes the natural love that acts as a light in us, an Eldar star that shines in times of darkness and crisis. With such comes acceptance, or the muslim term we use, redha,
things that comes into our way- obstacles or thorns in the journey towards loving the One God- won't affect us thoroughly. Instead, we accept, or if not, we learn to. Learning is the first step, its like a baby trying to walk on its two feet. Balancing is hard, but with lots of perseverance, determination, and luck, the baby finally walks.
Loving thyself, hence, is a major constructive idea to the path of acceptance, in which hence the root of all love. Learning yourself, respecting your body, mind and soul, is relevant in our journey to understand the fulfillments of Love.
PS: I love you dian. :)
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Some issues for you to think off.. =)
The blood of Buddhist monks beaten by soldiers loyal to Yangon ran red yesterday at the Ngwe Kyar Yan monastery. Protestors assembled there were mowed down by troops in the city, killing several on the spot.
Yet amid the chaos and the carnage, an old man dared to face down the army, shouting: "You eat food given to you by the people. Yet you kill people and you kill the monks." He spoke for a nation of 50 million who are feeling desperately poor. People feel that they have enough and they have little left to lose, after an era of military rule that dates back to 1962. Isnt this time for civilian to hold the reins of government afer nearly 40 years of military government?
General Than Shwe's incompetent junta triggered the saffron revolution led by monks that the army is now trying to crush. The junta has raised prices last month on items of basic necessities such as fuel, gas, chicken, eggs and cooking oil. This makes people who earn less than US$1 a day driven to desperation in a country blessed with oil, gas, minerals and timber. Where then has the national revenue gone too? The pockets of the ruling military generals of course!According to some Myanmar's officials, during the wedding of General Than Shwe's daughter recently. it was a lavishly affair possibly costing US$ 50 million.
Myanmar's revered Buddhist monks are aminously aware of the citizens suffering. Saffron and red robed monks have been leading crowds of up to 100,000 people in the largest protests since 1988.
What do people want? Freedom for Myanmar's democratic icon Novel Peace Laurette Aung San Suu Kyi, who won a 1990 election only to be declared invalid by the ruling junta. She was then cast aside and was practically held under house arrest.
The people of Myanmar wanted democracy. However Myanmar's democrats can expect little support locally since the ruling junta continues to hold a tight rein around the country. Internationally, little was done except economic sanctions and ocassional public dressdown. The United Nations Security Council has urged "restraint." The United States has imposed and stiffened economic sanctions. Canada, which shuns the junta, has denounced the army's brutal violence. But countries with real sway over Myanmar's junta which is China, India and Russia are doing business as usual.
China is believed to have a great influence over Myanmar, a fact that was denied by China. Undeniably, both countries have been cosy in bilateral, trade and military relations since they both shared communist ideologies. India is Myanmar's western neighbour and both countries have excellent ties. Myanmar has cooperated and acceded to India's request to help them solve their insurgent problems who seeks refuge in Myanmar's jungle, a favour that was much appreciated by India. Another heavyweight is Russia, who has given much support to the military regime.
China and Russia who are permanent members of the United Nations Security Council has effectively blocked US and European efforts to have the Security Council condemn and sanction the junta. China and Russia instead urged restraint on all sides. India prefers national reconciliation, a hope that is very obscure unless the junta is willing to give up its hold on power .
Ultimately, the Myanmar people, armed only with begging bowls for alms and sheer relentless courage, will prevail over this darkness that plagues the clouds of Yangon. This defiance of the junta shames the 3 quartets who have been supporting Myanmar namely, India who claims to be the world's largest democracy. Russia who continues to cast a blind eye on the violence and injustice. And it no doubt gives Myanmar's unelected master's aka China nightmares.
Dian_Farzanna loves Hubby Haz..
Yet amid the chaos and the carnage, an old man dared to face down the army, shouting: "You eat food given to you by the people. Yet you kill people and you kill the monks." He spoke for a nation of 50 million who are feeling desperately poor. People feel that they have enough and they have little left to lose, after an era of military rule that dates back to 1962. Isnt this time for civilian to hold the reins of government afer nearly 40 years of military government?
General Than Shwe's incompetent junta triggered the saffron revolution led by monks that the army is now trying to crush. The junta has raised prices last month on items of basic necessities such as fuel, gas, chicken, eggs and cooking oil. This makes people who earn less than US$1 a day driven to desperation in a country blessed with oil, gas, minerals and timber. Where then has the national revenue gone too? The pockets of the ruling military generals of course!According to some Myanmar's officials, during the wedding of General Than Shwe's daughter recently. it was a lavishly affair possibly costing US$ 50 million.
Myanmar's revered Buddhist monks are aminously aware of the citizens suffering. Saffron and red robed monks have been leading crowds of up to 100,000 people in the largest protests since 1988.
What do people want? Freedom for Myanmar's democratic icon Novel Peace Laurette Aung San Suu Kyi, who won a 1990 election only to be declared invalid by the ruling junta. She was then cast aside and was practically held under house arrest.
The people of Myanmar wanted democracy. However Myanmar's democrats can expect little support locally since the ruling junta continues to hold a tight rein around the country. Internationally, little was done except economic sanctions and ocassional public dressdown. The United Nations Security Council has urged "restraint." The United States has imposed and stiffened economic sanctions. Canada, which shuns the junta, has denounced the army's brutal violence. But countries with real sway over Myanmar's junta which is China, India and Russia are doing business as usual.
China is believed to have a great influence over Myanmar, a fact that was denied by China. Undeniably, both countries have been cosy in bilateral, trade and military relations since they both shared communist ideologies. India is Myanmar's western neighbour and both countries have excellent ties. Myanmar has cooperated and acceded to India's request to help them solve their insurgent problems who seeks refuge in Myanmar's jungle, a favour that was much appreciated by India. Another heavyweight is Russia, who has given much support to the military regime.
China and Russia who are permanent members of the United Nations Security Council has effectively blocked US and European efforts to have the Security Council condemn and sanction the junta. China and Russia instead urged restraint on all sides. India prefers national reconciliation, a hope that is very obscure unless the junta is willing to give up its hold on power .
Ultimately, the Myanmar people, armed only with begging bowls for alms and sheer relentless courage, will prevail over this darkness that plagues the clouds of Yangon. This defiance of the junta shames the 3 quartets who have been supporting Myanmar namely, India who claims to be the world's largest democracy. Russia who continues to cast a blind eye on the violence and injustice. And it no doubt gives Myanmar's unelected master's aka China nightmares.
Dian_Farzanna loves Hubby Haz..
Friday, September 28, 2007
Haiz.. Wad a long day for me, went for my hospital medical review wif my dad.. Then visited my mum in her ward.. Met my new baby sis.. She looks adorable.. Dad say she has my eyes and she resembles me when i was a baby.. Dad gave me the honour of naming her.. Wow! Somethin i neva do before sia.. So u prepared for it? Okae, i named my new baby sis Sheila Adella.. Nice isnt it? =) Welcome to the family dear..
Well, after dat long day i was very tired and shagged to the max.. Kinda depressed too, dunno why.. Missed my hubby lots too but there's nothing much i can do except to wait for everythin to be over.. But i can look forward to spendin time with him since he's gettin 3 more weeks of medical or hospitilisation leave..
While he was breakin his fast, i was out at the balcony.. Kinda haf my own personal time, reviewin on wads been happenin to me, some sort of lookin back on my life all this while.. Lotsa stuffs runnin thru my mind.. There's lotsa wad ifs n wad nots... I hope everythin goes well for me.. Insyallah..
Well, i tried to keep myself busy n distract myself from thinkin too much.. Did a bit of readin on wads happenin in the news.. N god, there's lotsa stuffs happenin in e world.. Allow me to indulge more on my readings if u dun mind..
One news dat caught my attention is the current situation whereby the monks are staging n organising demostrations and protests.. Firstly, before we jump to conclusions, lets disect and study the histroy of Myanmar..
Myanmar which is also known as Burma and is officially known as the Union of Myanmar.. By its geographical area itself, Myanmar is one of the largest country in SouthEastAsia.. Myanmar has an extensive porous border shared by China on the north, Laos on the east, Thailand on the southeast, Bangladesh on the west, and India on the northwest, with the Andaman Sea to the south, and the Bay of Bengal to the southwest..
Myanmar was colonised as a colony of United Kingdom during the British colonial era.. It got its independence from the United Kingdom on 4 January 1948 as the “Union of Burma”.. On 18 June 1989, the military-led "State Law and Order Restoration Council' adopted the name “Union of Myanmar”. Which was recognised by the United Nations but ironically not recognised by the United States and the United Kingdom..
Sao Shwe Thaik was its first President and U Nu its first Prime Minister.. Like the United Kingdom, although albeit distinct a bicameral parliament was formed, consisting of a Chamber of Deputies and a Chamber of Nationalities.. In 1962, General Ne Win led a coup that toppled the civilian government of U Nu.. He roughly ruled for 26 years and pursued socialist policies under of the "Burmese Way to Socialism".. Over the years of military rule, there was a mass exodus of citizen unrest over the dwindling economy and brutal political oppression by the military government.. This led to massive pro-democracy protests and demonstrations better known as the 8888 Uprising, famously organised by students.. In this event, hundreds of such demonstrators were massacred by the security forces..
Till now, Myanmar remains under the military control of the "State Peace and Development Council.". Currently Myanmar is headed by Senior General Than Shwe.. There were sporadic calls for the return of civilian rule and democracy to Myanmar.. As of 22 September 2007, the Buddhist monks in Myanmar have withdrawn spiritual services from all military personnel in a symbolic move that is seen as very powerful in such a deeply religious country as Myanmar. The military rulers seem at a loss as to how to deal with the demonstrations by the monks as using violence against monks would incense and enrage the people of Myanmar even further, almost certainly prompting massive civil unrest and perhaps violence. However, the longer the Junta allows the protests to continue, the weaker the regime looks. The danger is that eventually the military government will be forced to act rashly and doing so will provoke the citizenry even more. Some international news agencies are referring to the uprising as a Saffron Revolution.. Let the revolution begins...
Dian Farzanna loves Hubby Haz...
Well, after dat long day i was very tired and shagged to the max.. Kinda depressed too, dunno why.. Missed my hubby lots too but there's nothing much i can do except to wait for everythin to be over.. But i can look forward to spendin time with him since he's gettin 3 more weeks of medical or hospitilisation leave..
While he was breakin his fast, i was out at the balcony.. Kinda haf my own personal time, reviewin on wads been happenin to me, some sort of lookin back on my life all this while.. Lotsa stuffs runnin thru my mind.. There's lotsa wad ifs n wad nots... I hope everythin goes well for me.. Insyallah..
Well, i tried to keep myself busy n distract myself from thinkin too much.. Did a bit of readin on wads happenin in the news.. N god, there's lotsa stuffs happenin in e world.. Allow me to indulge more on my readings if u dun mind..
One news dat caught my attention is the current situation whereby the monks are staging n organising demostrations and protests.. Firstly, before we jump to conclusions, lets disect and study the histroy of Myanmar..
Myanmar which is also known as Burma and is officially known as the Union of Myanmar.. By its geographical area itself, Myanmar is one of the largest country in SouthEastAsia.. Myanmar has an extensive porous border shared by China on the north, Laos on the east, Thailand on the southeast, Bangladesh on the west, and India on the northwest, with the Andaman Sea to the south, and the Bay of Bengal to the southwest..
Myanmar was colonised as a colony of United Kingdom during the British colonial era.. It got its independence from the United Kingdom on 4 January 1948 as the “Union of Burma”.. On 18 June 1989, the military-led "State Law and Order Restoration Council' adopted the name “Union of Myanmar”. Which was recognised by the United Nations but ironically not recognised by the United States and the United Kingdom..
Sao Shwe Thaik was its first President and U Nu its first Prime Minister.. Like the United Kingdom, although albeit distinct a bicameral parliament was formed, consisting of a Chamber of Deputies and a Chamber of Nationalities.. In 1962, General Ne Win led a coup that toppled the civilian government of U Nu.. He roughly ruled for 26 years and pursued socialist policies under of the "Burmese Way to Socialism".. Over the years of military rule, there was a mass exodus of citizen unrest over the dwindling economy and brutal political oppression by the military government.. This led to massive pro-democracy protests and demonstrations better known as the 8888 Uprising, famously organised by students.. In this event, hundreds of such demonstrators were massacred by the security forces..
Till now, Myanmar remains under the military control of the "State Peace and Development Council.". Currently Myanmar is headed by Senior General Than Shwe.. There were sporadic calls for the return of civilian rule and democracy to Myanmar.. As of 22 September 2007, the Buddhist monks in Myanmar have withdrawn spiritual services from all military personnel in a symbolic move that is seen as very powerful in such a deeply religious country as Myanmar. The military rulers seem at a loss as to how to deal with the demonstrations by the monks as using violence against monks would incense and enrage the people of Myanmar even further, almost certainly prompting massive civil unrest and perhaps violence. However, the longer the Junta allows the protests to continue, the weaker the regime looks. The danger is that eventually the military government will be forced to act rashly and doing so will provoke the citizenry even more. Some international news agencies are referring to the uprising as a Saffron Revolution.. Let the revolution begins...
Dian Farzanna loves Hubby Haz...
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Musim Salju
Dedaun masa berputar sayapnya
Halus bertaburan bagai permata salji
Ku sapu titisan embun dari daun itu
Sayu
melihat wajahmu gemersik purnama rindu
Ku anyam sebaris kalimah
Lalu ku hembus ia irama memori cinta
Dari hati ke sebutir benih
Dari benih itu berputik kasih
Dengan megah pepohan berdiri indah
Namun tiada sundus seperti dahulu
Setiap kali ku lihat dedaun bertaburan ke bumi
Setiap kali ku kutip dedaun mati tak berlagu
Air mata mengalir tak reti henti
Bakawali yg jauh dari sisi
Namun kesejukan musim membeku segala
Ku menanti akan senyuman suriamu kejora abadi...
walaupun ia sejuta tahun lamanya..
-haz
Halus bertaburan bagai permata salji
Ku sapu titisan embun dari daun itu
Sayu
melihat wajahmu gemersik purnama rindu
Ku anyam sebaris kalimah
Lalu ku hembus ia irama memori cinta
Dari hati ke sebutir benih
Dari benih itu berputik kasih
Dengan megah pepohan berdiri indah
Namun tiada sundus seperti dahulu
Setiap kali ku lihat dedaun bertaburan ke bumi
Setiap kali ku kutip dedaun mati tak berlagu
Air mata mengalir tak reti henti
Bakawali yg jauh dari sisi
Namun kesejukan musim membeku segala
Ku menanti akan senyuman suriamu kejora abadi...
walaupun ia sejuta tahun lamanya..
-haz
Well, yesterday was quite a day.. Managed to gave two wonderful surprises to hubby haz.. It was his 20th bdae.. Sweet bdae =).. Firstly, i ordered him a cake of course.. A nice huge pure chocolatey cake that i'll knoe he will love.. Other than that, i wanna give him another pleasant surprise!! Was thinkin hard wad is it.. Cologne? Hmm.. I wan him to use it onlie wif me.. Hurhur! Bouquet of flowers? Hmm.. God, dat will be somethin totally new for him! Personalised bdae cards? Hmm.. Quite a good option.. But i wan sumthin different.. Realie different.. Was practically ransackin my brains.. Seiving thru my history column to see wad did he say he liked or would wanna have.. Aha! Eureka! He eva mentioned dat he would love to eat a apple struddle! Yea! So i was on the net, n did an online order for a nice warm apple struddle from Renaldo's.. =) Hubby was pleasantly surprised n im so glad i make him so happy n upbeat on his bdae.. He told me it was his best bdae ever.. More to come baby.. More to come.. Hurhur! =)
Up next, oh yea! I had my first phone conversation wif his mum! So nervous! Hurhur! I was feelin hot n blushin lar.. Haz msned me sayin "the daughter in law is talkin to mum.." Hurhur! It was a nice one.. She gave some words of comfort n advice.. But overall, i think she likes me! Hurhur.. Nice.. His dad seems to be approvin me being known in e family.. He likes my surprises, my cakes n my struddles.. Goodie! My scorecard so far? "A-" grade.. Hurhur!
I love you dear.. So much.. =)
Why is there more new lovers now..
Savour the night and indulge yourselves..
Up next, oh yea! I had my first phone conversation wif his mum! So nervous! Hurhur! I was feelin hot n blushin lar.. Haz msned me sayin "the daughter in law is talkin to mum.." Hurhur! It was a nice one.. She gave some words of comfort n advice.. But overall, i think she likes me! Hurhur.. Nice.. His dad seems to be approvin me being known in e family.. He likes my surprises, my cakes n my struddles.. Goodie! My scorecard so far? "A-" grade.. Hurhur!
I love you dear.. So much.. =)
When I think of youI think bout our love..
When the earth bloomed with spring..
Where the sky seemed so white..
And the misty dew of the morning lay still..
Oh, and i'll remember this..
And I always will..
Why is there more new lovers now..
Feelin funkin high..
Doing what we would have done..
For i know that i love you..
And it's a part of me and you..
Lo' you lovers, wherever you're..
Lo' you lovers, wherever you're..
I pray that you'll stay true..
For i've been thru' what you're goin thru'..
I've been in love like you..
Dont fake, be who you're and follow your star..
Dont fake, be who you're and follow your star..
Be brave, faithful and true..
Love one another, like you've never love before..
I've been in love like you..
Savour the night and indulge yourselves..
Go into a romantic trance..
Why is love so beautiful and true?
For it's one of God's handiwork..
Oh don't cry you lovers, just dont be..
Don't cry because because i'm alone..
Well cant you see that im happy tonite..
I've had my share of love..
I've had a love of my own..
And i will love him so...
Dian_Farzanna loves Hubby Haz.. =)
Ystd was my bdae!
25th September 2007 marks the end of my TEEN-anger era and blossom the new adulthood twen-TY life..
Still one more step to total complete 21 years of age, when a man cums on full fledge dogfighting species!
Tk caya plak aku dah masok 20, tua nye aku haha..
Tapi muka tetap maintain muda, yelar, pakai awet muda pe hahaha! *slaps forehead*
Aku nye janji sempena hari bahgia ini ialah:
1) More wiser
2) Perangai tk mcm budak2
3) Dengar kata ibu bapa
4) Kuat ibadah kpd Allah
5) Kuat semangat pabila ujian melanda
6) Jadi manusia yg dicontohi masyarakat
7) Jadi hubby yg bertanggungjawab atas honey nya hehe!
8) Kemas bilik aku dgn lebih rapi lagi
9) Kumpul duit untuk masa hadapan
10) Beli gue nyer ELECTRIC GUITAR masa musim Krismas complete dengan amplifier power
11) Beli perabot2 yg sepatotnya untuk me-revamp bilik aku yg tonggang tebalik
12) Tidak memboros
13) Teruskan tabiat gaya hidup sihat
14) Berbakti kpd keluarga
15) Tau selok-belok perjalanan di Orchard
16) Atur hidop aku agar masa depan aku taklar tersasar dari matlamat 2011 aku
17) Bersabar lebih banyak
18) Berkhidmat pada negara (ni susah sedikit, aku pasti tk lama lagi aku khianat ni janji muahaha)
19) Menjinakkan diri dengan hobi membaca buku (aku ni memang pemalas orgnyer!)
20) Meninjau hidup aku luar dari mainstream hidup org singapura (untuk masa depan aku)
Haha, itulah dia, DUA PULUH janji sempena hari lahirku yg ke DUA PULUH! SYABAS!
Back to ystd.
Ystd honey had arranged for me the bestest bdae i EVER had in my whole life. Sumpah, aku tk penah menyambut hari lahir aku dgn hadiah, haha, sedih kan?
I was so shocked i became like numb for a while, den the smile came in late with a bit of tears here n there *awwwww*.
Pd tepat pukul 1215hrs, I receive a bdae cake with her pic on it from dis apek hahaha!
Nice right? Told ya..
And it taste so nice my family had second helping!!
(oh, and i had my third filling at midnight hehe, shhh!)
The cake is complete with loads of nice finger licking mouth watering chocolate, thou there is no wafers like the first, but its still unique as the layers are all packed with nice yummy chocolate!
Then the nxt suprise came ard 1530hrs.
I was looking at this long box of dunno wad things as i signed the papers.
Wondering wads inside *thinking naughtily hehe* I braved myself for another deep into the pool of excitement!
Jeng jeng jeng!!
APPLE STRUDDLES!!!!!
Its sSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSOOOOO yummy!
The sugar frost are so nice! :))
Its from this shop I've never been at Renaldo's!
25th September 2007 marks the end of my TEEN-anger era and blossom the new adulthood twen-TY life..
Still one more step to total complete 21 years of age, when a man cums on full fledge dogfighting species!
Tk caya plak aku dah masok 20, tua nye aku haha..
Tapi muka tetap maintain muda, yelar, pakai awet muda pe hahaha! *slaps forehead*
Aku nye janji sempena hari bahgia ini ialah:
1) More wiser
2) Perangai tk mcm budak2
3) Dengar kata ibu bapa
4) Kuat ibadah kpd Allah
5) Kuat semangat pabila ujian melanda
6) Jadi manusia yg dicontohi masyarakat
7) Jadi hubby yg bertanggungjawab atas honey nya hehe!
8) Kemas bilik aku dgn lebih rapi lagi
9) Kumpul duit untuk masa hadapan
10) Beli gue nyer ELECTRIC GUITAR masa musim Krismas complete dengan amplifier power
11) Beli perabot2 yg sepatotnya untuk me-revamp bilik aku yg tonggang tebalik
12) Tidak memboros
13) Teruskan tabiat gaya hidup sihat
14) Berbakti kpd keluarga
15) Tau selok-belok perjalanan di Orchard
16) Atur hidop aku agar masa depan aku taklar tersasar dari matlamat 2011 aku
17) Bersabar lebih banyak
18) Berkhidmat pada negara (ni susah sedikit, aku pasti tk lama lagi aku khianat ni janji muahaha)
19) Menjinakkan diri dengan hobi membaca buku (aku ni memang pemalas orgnyer!)
20) Meninjau hidup aku luar dari mainstream hidup org singapura (untuk masa depan aku)
Haha, itulah dia, DUA PULUH janji sempena hari lahirku yg ke DUA PULUH! SYABAS!
Back to ystd.
Ystd honey had arranged for me the bestest bdae i EVER had in my whole life. Sumpah, aku tk penah menyambut hari lahir aku dgn hadiah, haha, sedih kan?
I was so shocked i became like numb for a while, den the smile came in late with a bit of tears here n there *awwwww*.
Pd tepat pukul 1215hrs, I receive a bdae cake with her pic on it from dis apek hahaha!
Nice right? Told ya..And it taste so nice my family had second helping!!
(oh, and i had my third filling at midnight hehe, shhh!)
The cake is complete with loads of nice finger licking mouth watering chocolate, thou there is no wafers like the first, but its still unique as the layers are all packed with nice yummy chocolate!
Then the nxt suprise came ard 1530hrs.
I was looking at this long box of dunno wad things as i signed the papers.
Wondering wads inside *thinking naughtily hehe* I braved myself for another deep into the pool of excitement!
Jeng jeng jeng!!
APPLE STRUDDLES!!!!!
Its sSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSOOOOO yummy!
The sugar frost are so nice! :))
Its from this shop I've never been at Renaldo's!
Its so nice..
Then buka posa I adalah busy org tu asek msg I "cepat! =p", haish, org aderlah sebok dgn memasak NASI AYAM (aku tau masak ler!) org tu asek ckp je, hahaha, jgn marah har..
All finish, I n sum help from the lazy ones laid the table, just in time for the maghrib azan.
Only got a small space for the struddle, tu pon I cut it into half, then I microwave it haha.
That's a bad move i must say, for the apple sauce inside melted hahaha!
My dad ate it like makan nasi hahaha! But the comments are all the same - absolutely super!
After terawih, I cut the cake and served them, my dad ate them without any comment AT FIRST cuz he was busily watching tv (guys duh *slaps forehead*). After the tv show, he secretly went in for second helping hahaha!
Nice...
Then we talked on the phone, u n I, it was very nice ayg, so touching..
:) I OWE YOU BIG TIME GURL!!
PS: I love you more than ever!
Then buka posa I adalah busy org tu asek msg I "cepat! =p", haish, org aderlah sebok dgn memasak NASI AYAM (aku tau masak ler!) org tu asek ckp je, hahaha, jgn marah har..
All finish, I n sum help from the lazy ones laid the table, just in time for the maghrib azan.
Only got a small space for the struddle, tu pon I cut it into half, then I microwave it haha.
That's a bad move i must say, for the apple sauce inside melted hahaha!
My dad ate it like makan nasi hahaha! But the comments are all the same - absolutely super!
After terawih, I cut the cake and served them, my dad ate them without any comment AT FIRST cuz he was busily watching tv (guys duh *slaps forehead*). After the tv show, he secretly went in for second helping hahaha!
Nice...
Then we talked on the phone, u n I, it was very nice ayg, so touching..
:) I OWE YOU BIG TIME GURL!!
PS: I love you more than ever!
Thursday, September 20, 2007
For You
- I adore you.
- I am infatuated with you.
- I appreciate you.
- I can't live without you.
- I can't stop thinking about you when we're apart.
- I cherish you.
- I dream of you.
- I live for our love.
- I love being around you.
- I need you by my side.
- I need you.
- I respect you.
- I value you.
- I want a lifetime with you.
- I want you.
- I worship you.
- I yearn for you.
- I'm a better person because of you.
- I'm blessed to have you in my life.
- I'm devoted to you.
- I'm fond of you.
- I'm lost without you.
- I'm nothing without you.
- I'm passionate about you.
- I'm thankful for you.
- I'm yours.
- Me and you. Always.
- My love is unconditional.
- Our love is invaluable.
- Take me, I'm yours.
- The thought of you brings a smile to my face.
- Ti tengu cara (to female) or Ti tengu caru (to male).
- Together, forever.
- We were meant to be together.
- You are a blessing in disguise.
- You are an angel from God.
- You are like a candle burning bright.
- You are my crush.
- You are my dear.
- You are my everything.
- You are my one and only.
- You are my reason for living.
- You are my strength.
- You are my sunshine.
- You are my treasure.
- You are my world.
- You are precious.
- You are the light of my life.
- You are the reason I'm alive.
- You bring happiness to rainy days.
- You bring joy to my life.
- You cast a spell on me that can't be broken.
- You complete me.
- You drive me wild.
- You fill me with desire.
- You fill my heart.
- You give me wings to fly.
- You had me from hello.
- You hold the key to my heart.
- You inspire me.
- You intoxicate me.
- You lift me up to touch the sky.
- You light my flame.
- You light up my life.
- You make me hot.
- You make my heart skip a beat.
- You make my world a better place.
- You mean the world to me.
- You motivate me.
- You rock my world.
- You seduce me.
- You set my heart on fire.
- You simply amaze me.
- You stole my heart.
- You sweeten my sour days.
- You turn my world upside down.
- You're a dream come true.
- You're a gem.
- You're a twinkle in my eye.
- You're absolutely wonderful.
- You're all I want.
- You're as beautiful as a sunset.
- You're beautiful.
- You're charming.
- You're enchanting.
- You're heavenly.
- You're my angel
- You're one in a million.
- You're priceless.
- You're sexy.
- You're the apple of my eye.
- You're the best thing that ever happened to me.
- You're the best.
- You're the diamond in the rough.
- You're the one for me.
- You're the one I've always wished for
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
I hope she comes back soon..
N in healthy condition..
Cuz im just going from sad to depression lately, but alhamdulilah, its good to be a muslim having God by ur side to calm things down..
Its like a total blow for the both of us, she having to suffer, me having to wait in agony, its like a shithole n we're dropping in a bowl of shithole.
Im a type of guy that sets goals in life. One of them was that she wud be back here to see me in Sept.
N its not just the disappointment that kills, its the way we went thru it together..
Ayg u can never compare what ruz n mizan is sharing..
He do not need to wait that long to hear ruz voice.
I waited for 3mths.. But i still waited..
The sacrifices both of us put across the table was an amazing feat.
I know i have to be strong, last night i put down my guard, n see ayg, see.. I cannot be weak.. I can never be..
You have me to share your sadness with, but me? I cannot affort to do so, cz u need me more, n for that i shall sacrifice my own feelings for you..
I wanna put aside everything of me n just focus on u, to make u feel happy, to be there for you wen u need me n all..
As for me, well, i have God ayg.. I have myself n God, n i think its enuf dat way.. Until there comes a time when you're strong enuf den I'll be able to share what i really feel, deep down there in the deepest parts of my emotions..
You're the best ayg, you gave me hope, the ability to believe in loving a person once again, you put a smile on my face everytime we talk over the phone, sharing words of comfort..
You're the source of my inspiration, I never felt so happy before..
You're the one ayg, I will never give up on you, never..
We share so much, so much joy n pain, I must admit that it is tough, but i love you, and i really really do, deep down there, i just do..
We have to be patient, we have to, for God, our family, us..
Im always here to love you, n listen to you, share with you what you feel..
You've been the bestest friend, gf, wife ever, ayg, EVER..
I shall hold my promises by my stride..
Do recover kae.. Pray alot, eat healthy, do what i told you, insya'allah you'll be back home wimme..
So that you can bake cookies for hari raya at my house with mum..
Mum wanna see you.. She kirim doa dan sayang..
Loads of hugs n kisses..
-bie
PS: I love you
N in healthy condition..
Cuz im just going from sad to depression lately, but alhamdulilah, its good to be a muslim having God by ur side to calm things down..
Its like a total blow for the both of us, she having to suffer, me having to wait in agony, its like a shithole n we're dropping in a bowl of shithole.
Im a type of guy that sets goals in life. One of them was that she wud be back here to see me in Sept.
N its not just the disappointment that kills, its the way we went thru it together..
Ayg u can never compare what ruz n mizan is sharing..
He do not need to wait that long to hear ruz voice.
I waited for 3mths.. But i still waited..
The sacrifices both of us put across the table was an amazing feat.
I know i have to be strong, last night i put down my guard, n see ayg, see.. I cannot be weak.. I can never be..
You have me to share your sadness with, but me? I cannot affort to do so, cz u need me more, n for that i shall sacrifice my own feelings for you..
I wanna put aside everything of me n just focus on u, to make u feel happy, to be there for you wen u need me n all..
As for me, well, i have God ayg.. I have myself n God, n i think its enuf dat way.. Until there comes a time when you're strong enuf den I'll be able to share what i really feel, deep down there in the deepest parts of my emotions..
You're the best ayg, you gave me hope, the ability to believe in loving a person once again, you put a smile on my face everytime we talk over the phone, sharing words of comfort..
You're the source of my inspiration, I never felt so happy before..
You're the one ayg, I will never give up on you, never..
We share so much, so much joy n pain, I must admit that it is tough, but i love you, and i really really do, deep down there, i just do..
We have to be patient, we have to, for God, our family, us..
Im always here to love you, n listen to you, share with you what you feel..
You've been the bestest friend, gf, wife ever, ayg, EVER..
I shall hold my promises by my stride..
Do recover kae.. Pray alot, eat healthy, do what i told you, insya'allah you'll be back home wimme..
So that you can bake cookies for hari raya at my house with mum..
Mum wanna see you.. She kirim doa dan sayang..
Loads of hugs n kisses..
-bie
PS: I love you
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