Fasting month is indeed tough.
I tried restraining myself from every argument I faced, be it on facebook about metaphysical aspects of Islam, be it on the forum pages in yahoo, or anywhere.
But yesterday alhamdulilah, the outcome is a good one.
It is always a good outcome if you refer it all to the Omnipotent One, start it out with the right adab, so that the fires of the heart is not expelled. And even if it does, it is expelled out on the pretense of restraining khianah and angst in the heart, which according to our Mualim, like 'a poison dagger stab through the heart.'
It has always been islamising the process of our thinking. And carry it out with full of akhlak, adab, iman and ikhsan.
Only then can our love be amplified towards the betterment of the ummah, insya'allah.
Other than that, I hope in 4 years time Yoko churns out to be like Lady Gaga. She is absolutely hot!!!!! :p
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Sunday, August 23, 2009
swimming in the juice
ARSENAL WON!! WOHOOOO~
I should be guilty for saying so much about Diaby. But hey, seriously, we are heading to a good start this season. Although I still insist on them bucking up on defensive, like perhaps getting a good strong midfielder, or still get a strong striker that can hold up the ball at frontline, or perhaps, just a stroke of individual brilliance.
Of course, im talking about getting:
1) Lionel Messi
2) Vandervart
3) Xavi
These players can make it happen. :D
I can't sleep. I had too much weird dreams at the moment. And I have this sudden random feeling of flying to yoko's house and take her for a flight to the moon.
~~~
As I stared and look at the stars, I asked the Angel. "What is it that is empty between the stars?"
The Angel answered, with such strength and wisdom, she said, "It is the ignorance of those who ignore the stars and beyond."
The flower pot stood still like a sullen shadow, casting a grim smile as it drop a few petals on the strawberry grass.
The boy stood aghast at such words. Words that shall haunt him for the rest of his life.
I should be guilty for saying so much about Diaby. But hey, seriously, we are heading to a good start this season. Although I still insist on them bucking up on defensive, like perhaps getting a good strong midfielder, or still get a strong striker that can hold up the ball at frontline, or perhaps, just a stroke of individual brilliance.
Of course, im talking about getting:
1) Lionel Messi
2) Vandervart
3) Xavi
These players can make it happen. :D
I can't sleep. I had too much weird dreams at the moment. And I have this sudden random feeling of flying to yoko's house and take her for a flight to the moon.
~~~
As I stared and look at the stars, I asked the Angel. "What is it that is empty between the stars?"
The Angel answered, with such strength and wisdom, she said, "It is the ignorance of those who ignore the stars and beyond."
The flower pot stood still like a sullen shadow, casting a grim smile as it drop a few petals on the strawberry grass.
The boy stood aghast at such words. Words that shall haunt him for the rest of his life.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
To shave! pussy cat!
Camp was a blast I guess.. but seriously I think without the likes of Harold and Kumar there won't be much of a fun! HAHA!
And to think that Harold even went to my grand dad's house to read tahlil with my family. Although I must say it seems a bit odd to bring a friend, but his my best friend, so I guess that will do.
I came across an opportunity when Mr Faizal of Mendaki came to give us a talk on Mendaki. Although it is not the first time im listening to Mendaki's programme, nor its the first time im hearing people enquiring about Mendaki's loan programmes and even *ahem ahem* its rather edgy criterias. But rather, im interested on the fact that it gave me just the idea to initiate something.
I was hoping I could work out two major initiatives that I deemed to be my long term projects:
1) Create a platform where passionate Malay volunteering leaders are trained to be good volunteer leaders to carry out and spread the knowledge of volunteerism to the community. I envisioned myself as the forerunners who brought the understanding of the purpose of knowledge as a holistic approach to solve the problems in our Malay community. Henceforth, in order to do so, we must create a breed of volunteers trained to inspire, develop, and nurture more leaders. Thus, a focused project that focuses primarily on the development of volunteer leaders would certainly inject 'quality' rather than 'quantity'.
2) Create a blueprint in which Muslims can manifest upon the 'RAHMATIL LIL ALAMIN' fund that was created recently by MUIS. Perhaps there could exist a linking bridge between the donated funds of RLA and the zakat recipients of FISABILILLAH and RIQAB. Insya'allah, further research would be carried out to identify the availability of such linkage. This is definitely helpful, as with increase of funds on these platform, perhaps there could exist a common platform for a 'Knowledge Fund' which is for every Muslim who wishes to pursue knowledge. It is important on my personal note, to have such a commodity for the Muslims in Singapore, to achieve the objectives of an ummah of excellance.
What I am basically referring to, is yes, the understanding or perhaps, the foundations of knowledge itself. The importance of knowledge in a community can be heard almost everywhere in the Muslim Worldview -from the first Surah that mentions, 'Read', through various biblical sources both quranic or hadith, to the enormity of philosophical theologies of education. However, much to our dismay, it is from that lack of understanding of the importance of knowledge that has brought about calamatic droughts to our already broken ummah. It was saddening to see many Malay/Muslin families still suffering with debts, broken societal bonds, and many other detailed rapture that has created an aura of negativity around the Malay/Muslim community here. It is upon this stereotype, or should I clearly define it as, a common stigma, that I see imperative to be discussed on an intellectual level, and act upon as such.
The importance of the understanding of knowledge can be broken down into a few major parts:
1) the influencing power of knowledge and its effects on the community
2) akhlak as a tool to master the powers of knowledge
3) the differentiation of knowledge (Western Ideas v/s Islamic Worldview) and how it is already influencing us and how it can influence
4) the relevance in understanding the importance of knowledge
It is only then, can I justify a story that was shared to me by someone.
THE LION AND THE PIG
The pig, having given birth to many piglings, decided to approach the lion who was taking a nap under a tree. The pig awakened the lion with an arrogant snort, "What are you doing Lion? Look at me, I have a lot of children! So one day I can rule this Island with it."
The Lion, truly oblivious with the pig's presence, merely murmured, "Look at my two sons. They are warriors."
Moral of the story?
Quality v/s Quantity. You give it a thought. :)
PS: Im still laughing at how Harold threw those balloons at him. Goodness, what pure brute and anger. HAHAHAHAHAHA! marah nampak? marah nampak? :p
and aku tak nak tgk G.I Joe. Merepek jer. Maner ade pompuan HOT masok army. Tengok dia pegang pistol jer cam seram, takot2 tertembak diri sendiri HAHAHA!
Now for some rock n' roll..
And to think that Harold even went to my grand dad's house to read tahlil with my family. Although I must say it seems a bit odd to bring a friend, but his my best friend, so I guess that will do.
I came across an opportunity when Mr Faizal of Mendaki came to give us a talk on Mendaki. Although it is not the first time im listening to Mendaki's programme, nor its the first time im hearing people enquiring about Mendaki's loan programmes and even *ahem ahem* its rather edgy criterias. But rather, im interested on the fact that it gave me just the idea to initiate something.
I was hoping I could work out two major initiatives that I deemed to be my long term projects:
1) Create a platform where passionate Malay volunteering leaders are trained to be good volunteer leaders to carry out and spread the knowledge of volunteerism to the community. I envisioned myself as the forerunners who brought the understanding of the purpose of knowledge as a holistic approach to solve the problems in our Malay community. Henceforth, in order to do so, we must create a breed of volunteers trained to inspire, develop, and nurture more leaders. Thus, a focused project that focuses primarily on the development of volunteer leaders would certainly inject 'quality' rather than 'quantity'.
2) Create a blueprint in which Muslims can manifest upon the 'RAHMATIL LIL ALAMIN' fund that was created recently by MUIS. Perhaps there could exist a linking bridge between the donated funds of RLA and the zakat recipients of FISABILILLAH and RIQAB. Insya'allah, further research would be carried out to identify the availability of such linkage. This is definitely helpful, as with increase of funds on these platform, perhaps there could exist a common platform for a 'Knowledge Fund' which is for every Muslim who wishes to pursue knowledge. It is important on my personal note, to have such a commodity for the Muslims in Singapore, to achieve the objectives of an ummah of excellance.
What I am basically referring to, is yes, the understanding or perhaps, the foundations of knowledge itself. The importance of knowledge in a community can be heard almost everywhere in the Muslim Worldview -from the first Surah that mentions, 'Read', through various biblical sources both quranic or hadith, to the enormity of philosophical theologies of education. However, much to our dismay, it is from that lack of understanding of the importance of knowledge that has brought about calamatic droughts to our already broken ummah. It was saddening to see many Malay/Muslin families still suffering with debts, broken societal bonds, and many other detailed rapture that has created an aura of negativity around the Malay/Muslim community here. It is upon this stereotype, or should I clearly define it as, a common stigma, that I see imperative to be discussed on an intellectual level, and act upon as such.
The importance of the understanding of knowledge can be broken down into a few major parts:
1) the influencing power of knowledge and its effects on the community
2) akhlak as a tool to master the powers of knowledge
3) the differentiation of knowledge (Western Ideas v/s Islamic Worldview) and how it is already influencing us and how it can influence
4) the relevance in understanding the importance of knowledge
It is only then, can I justify a story that was shared to me by someone.
THE LION AND THE PIG
The pig, having given birth to many piglings, decided to approach the lion who was taking a nap under a tree. The pig awakened the lion with an arrogant snort, "What are you doing Lion? Look at me, I have a lot of children! So one day I can rule this Island with it."
The Lion, truly oblivious with the pig's presence, merely murmured, "Look at my two sons. They are warriors."
Moral of the story?
Quality v/s Quantity. You give it a thought. :)
PS: Im still laughing at how Harold threw those balloons at him. Goodness, what pure brute and anger. HAHAHAHAHAHA! marah nampak? marah nampak? :p
and aku tak nak tgk G.I Joe. Merepek jer. Maner ade pompuan HOT masok army. Tengok dia pegang pistol jer cam seram, takot2 tertembak diri sendiri HAHAHA!
Now for some rock n' roll..
Saturday, August 15, 2009
An Individual for the society
I cannot sleep. I am still thinking about the many questions in my brain.
How can I be possible to help others when I alone am not good enough for it?
Many would say that it is my selfish attempt, perhaps an excuse, to explain my lack of societal responsibilities.
Actually, I dun care what people would say.
Somebody wise told me, you would be judge by God as an individual and not as a collective group of individuals. Needless to say, it is my own actions, my actions alone, that will determine the outcome of my ambiguous life.
So im now asking myself again. What is my purpose in this life?
And I need to stick to it. No point influencing others, sharing them what are my thoughts, when they themselves do not understand. No point blabbering about socio politics and islamic perspectives in a society when I myself am wronged and imperfect. No point trying to convince others to see the dual-partner of an angle in order to achieve some sort of understanding. No point.
Simply because, Im not good enough. And I am deviating, and keep deviating, from my purpose in this world.
I am but a small dirt in the eyes of God. :(
Hati hiba mengenangkan dosa2 yg ku lakukan,
Oh Tuhan Maha Kuasa,
Terima taubat hamba berdosa...
Ku akui kelemahan diri,
Ku insafi kekurangan ini,
Ku kesali kejahilan ini,
Terimalah 3x.....
Taubatku ini.....
Telah aku merasakan derita jiwa dan perasaan,
Kerana hilang dari jalan menuju redhaMu ya Tuhan.
Ku akui kelemahan ini,
Ku insafi kekurangan ini,
Ku kesali kejahilan ini,
Terimalah 3x...
Taubatku ini...
How can I be possible to help others when I alone am not good enough for it?
Many would say that it is my selfish attempt, perhaps an excuse, to explain my lack of societal responsibilities.
Actually, I dun care what people would say.
Somebody wise told me, you would be judge by God as an individual and not as a collective group of individuals. Needless to say, it is my own actions, my actions alone, that will determine the outcome of my ambiguous life.
So im now asking myself again. What is my purpose in this life?
And I need to stick to it. No point influencing others, sharing them what are my thoughts, when they themselves do not understand. No point blabbering about socio politics and islamic perspectives in a society when I myself am wronged and imperfect. No point trying to convince others to see the dual-partner of an angle in order to achieve some sort of understanding. No point.
Simply because, Im not good enough. And I am deviating, and keep deviating, from my purpose in this world.
I am but a small dirt in the eyes of God. :(
Hati hiba mengenangkan dosa2 yg ku lakukan,
Oh Tuhan Maha Kuasa,
Terima taubat hamba berdosa...
Ku akui kelemahan diri,
Ku insafi kekurangan ini,
Ku kesali kejahilan ini,
Terimalah 3x.....
Taubatku ini.....
Telah aku merasakan derita jiwa dan perasaan,
Kerana hilang dari jalan menuju redhaMu ya Tuhan.
Ku akui kelemahan ini,
Ku insafi kekurangan ini,
Ku kesali kejahilan ini,
Terimalah 3x...
Taubatku ini...
Wednesday, August 05, 2009
ignorance lies in blindness
AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
I feel crap. Sometimes I just want to be among the ignorant.
Today I choose to be ignorant. Only today.
And I pity those people who do not appreciate others, especially to those who put their heart and soul to it. I pity them for being blinded by their selfish greeds and incomprehensible methodology of thinking. I pity them for not having the zest, spirit, industriously-gaining, forward-looking and the will to see more than just a form of matter.
I pity you. I pray that Allah open your heart and let you see what I see, hear what I hear, feel what I feel.. And in time.
You'll understand what is truly hidden, what is truly forbidden, and what is truly real.
Now for some good ol' rock and roll to shove away the blues...
I feel crap. Sometimes I just want to be among the ignorant.
Today I choose to be ignorant. Only today.
And I pity those people who do not appreciate others, especially to those who put their heart and soul to it. I pity them for being blinded by their selfish greeds and incomprehensible methodology of thinking. I pity them for not having the zest, spirit, industriously-gaining, forward-looking and the will to see more than just a form of matter.
I pity you. I pray that Allah open your heart and let you see what I see, hear what I hear, feel what I feel.. And in time.
You'll understand what is truly hidden, what is truly forbidden, and what is truly real.
Now for some good ol' rock and roll to shove away the blues...
TURN UP THE SUN
I carry a madness
Everywhere I go
Over the border
and back to the snow
So if you see me
and I look right through
You shouldn't take it
as a reflection on you
Come on, turn up the sun
Turn it up for everyone
Love one another
Love one another
The boys in the bubble
They wanna be free
They got so blind
That they cannot see
But I'm not your keeper
I don't have a key
I got a piano
I can't find the 'C'
Come one, turn up the sun
Turn it up for everyone
Love one another
Love one another
Come on, turn up the sun,
Turn it up, for everyone
Love one another,
Love one another.
I carry a madness
Everywhere I go
Over the border
and back to the snow
So if you see me
and I look right through
You shouldn't take it
as a reflection on you
Come on, turn up the sun
Turn it up for everyone
Love one another
Love one another
The boys in the bubble
They wanna be free
They got so blind
That they cannot see
But I'm not your keeper
I don't have a key
I got a piano
I can't find the 'C'
Come one, turn up the sun
Turn it up for everyone
Love one another
Love one another
Come on, turn up the sun,
Turn it up, for everyone
Love one another,
Love one another.
So much for "LOVE ONE ANOTHER".. bullshit.
Sunday, August 02, 2009
O Heedless Soul
Taken from Nash's blog (http://benash69.blogspot.com), it struck me very very deep.
Enjoy. :)
Enjoy. :)
O Heedless Soul,how fooled are You?
You came into this World with Having Nothing
Yet You claim to be Superior
Shame on You
Arrogance and Pride defines You
In Your Pocket,filled with Money
None is spend wisely in the Way of God
You foolishly claim that You're Rich
You came from Clay and end up with Clay
You thought all Along,You were Clean
Not Knowing That You are just filled with Filth
You still want to have Claims about Yourself?
God asked that You praised His Beloved s.a.w
But You idolize All the Others except Him s.a.w
You shouted Out Names of Artists
But when comes to Saluting Him,Your Mouth Freeze
You furnishes Your Outer Self with Materialism
Yet Your Inner Soul still continue to Darken with Time
Your Thoughts are filled with Worldly Desires
Of the Hereafter,You care Not
You boasts of Your Wealth and Ranking
So Dumbed that You failed to Realize that
You came into this World with Having Nothing
Yet You claim to be Superior
Shame on You
Arrogance and Pride defines You
In Your Pocket,filled with Money
None is spend wisely in the Way of God
You foolishly claim that You're Rich
You came from Clay and end up with Clay
You thought all Along,You were Clean
Not Knowing That You are just filled with Filth
You still want to have Claims about Yourself?
God asked that You praised His Beloved s.a.w
But You idolize All the Others except Him s.a.w
You shouted Out Names of Artists
But when comes to Saluting Him,Your Mouth Freeze
You furnishes Your Outer Self with Materialism
Yet Your Inner Soul still continue to Darken with Time
Your Thoughts are filled with Worldly Desires
Of the Hereafter,You care Not
You boasts of Your Wealth and Ranking
So Dumbed that You failed to Realize that
You are just of No Worth
You give No Credits to the Almighty
Who Gives You Sufficient Provisions to make You Sustainable
Saturday, August 01, 2009
A Strawberry Poem For Yoko
Imagine a world without fear
where all of the realms of the roses collide
in clouds of alchemy and dust
and strawberry drops pitter pattering down on our necks
and strawberry puddles to ponder
Imagine a world without love
where all the darkness shudder
in clouds of alchemy and dust
and strawberry drops battering down on our necks
and strawberry puddles to wonder
Imagine a world without you
I cannot bear such a strawberry delight...
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Hallows v/s Horcruxes
I finished reading all 10 books including my fav Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, not to mention the thick book my dad gave it to me called, "Tasawuf and Science" as material resource for my students. Frankly speaking, its really tough and stressful to be in front of many mu'allafs that are of different background, each having their own questions. They are like small children- curious about the religion that bore on them. However, few would make my mind go fuzzy with difficult questions like, "How do you explain Muhammad's ascend to God with respect to Science?" and "If Muhammad is ascending, then is God above us? If that's the case, then who guards the bottom?" It is in such that I find difficulties, especially when it involves the metaphysics of it. One wrong answer, and poof! I'll be questioned by Him at thereafter. Haha!
Good thing I have dad to help me out. He taught me alot. Especially how he views God and us. And how far are we from Him. Distance, in this situation, would then be defined as our knowledge of Him. Sometimes when my students asked too much questions about the Omnipotent One, especially the metaphysical perspective, I would point the question back at them. Who are we to know the secrets of God, when we are sinned? It is thus, imperative, to look into ourselves and then try and find the essence of God in us.
I find completing the Harry Potter series an ambitous attempt to seek the philosophical value of it. I always question myself, the Horcruxes, the Deathly Hallows, Love and Hate, all a mere hidden symbols to what we define as life. A person splits his soul into 7 different beings to gain immortality? How about we view it in this manner? A person splits his soul into 7 different negative characters in his quest to gain perfection? So let's then discuss the 7 evil beings.
1) Anger
2) Jelousy
3) Love for the Earthly Pleasures
4) Riya' -proud in action
5) Takkabur- making comparisons between us and people
6) Love for Complimentaion
7) Boastful
These characteristic would surely split our soul and make us evil, unworthy of God.
However, it is said that the Deathly Hallows, 3 remarkable magical items, can destroy the Horcruxes. How about we say, 3 remarkable characteristics that can help us in understanding and embracing God.
1) Iman - Faith
2) Islam - Syari'ah
3) Ikhsan - Love and empathy
Thus, with these hallows, one can surely surpass the advent of evil sparked in our hearts.
I know this may sound weird, but, let's just say, in every idea, there is a hidden code of God. It can either unite us, or simply break us. :)
Enough of values.
I remember texting my Yoko about eloping. I told her, "I just feel like kidnapping you right now and run away to explore life that awaits us."
She replied, "Well, that'll be the most craziest thing we'd gonna do."
Love is a curiously crazy little potion, I must say..
SWEET! :D
Friday, July 24, 2009
Taking a ship with niat
After 4 days of companionship, it got me into thinking of something unperturbed. And thus I seek an advise from my mum.
All she did was say, "Pray to Allah, and redha. And continue."
It was a blessing that I knew would come in handy in times of crisis.
And I knew the journey to seek the truth we have embarked together won't come cheap and easy. So I entrusted this to Allah, and will try my very best to serve as His slave.
I knew she is the one. And fits perfectly. Like a jigsaw puzzle.
And here I am blogging while listening to my mum reading the quran. Haha!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
I asked her, "Ma, what is it in the Quran that you see?"
She replied in an almost trance-like, "I am reading the soul of the Quran. Not the kalimah."
Moral of the story? Read with your heart, and not just your brain. :)
And..
When you see the world, don't just see it with your eyes. When you hear the sounds of the world, don't just listen with your ears. When you touch the painted illusions of the world, don't just touch it with your hands. When you commune with the world, don't just talk with your mouth. When you sniff on the array of fragrances of the world, don't just smell it with your nose. It is in such that makes you blind.
What you need is to see with your heart. Smell with your heart, taste, hear, talk, and touch it with. And soon you'll realise you are in total communion with your soul. And of course, the soul of the world.
On the other hand..
I’m seeing a whole
Nother world in my mind
girl I'm feeling
an' breathing in love all the time
you turn me on, love’s like a bomb, blowing my mind
you turn me on, love’s like a bomb, blowing my mind
am i reaching the world
that i want deep inside
girl i mean it
and you hold the key to the shrine
cos turn me on, love’s like a bomb, blowing my mind
you turn me on, love’s like a bomb, blowing my mind
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
A milestone
After a year plus long battle against finding my own identity and proper placing in this world..
After a year plus long battle in search of an essence of humanity..
After a year plus long battle to free myself from my own cage..
I am at last..
Longed..
It is a thus, a blessed moment I shall never forget. It is the greatest feeling. I always wished that I was longed. I knew God longed for me as how I longed for Him. But coming from a human's heart... Truly a magical miracle. :)
I have found my own Yoko Ono.
And we shall walk through the rainbow peels, unperturbed by the icy winds that continued floating the air.
After a year plus long battle in search of an essence of humanity..
After a year plus long battle to free myself from my own cage..
I am at last..
Longed..
It is a thus, a blessed moment I shall never forget. It is the greatest feeling. I always wished that I was longed. I knew God longed for me as how I longed for Him. But coming from a human's heart... Truly a magical miracle. :)
I have found my own Yoko Ono.
And we shall walk through the rainbow peels, unperturbed by the icy winds that continued floating the air.
Monday, July 20, 2009
A confession
Afgan – Bukan Cinta Biasa (OST Bukan Cinta Biasa)
Kali ini kusadari
Aku telah jatuh cinta
Dari hatiku terdalam
Sungguh aku cinta padamu
Cintaku bukanlah cinta biasa
Jika kamu yang memiliki
Dan kamu yang temaniku seumur hidupku
Terimalah pengakuanku
Percayalah kepadaku
Semua ini kulakukan
Karena kamu memang untukku
Cinta ku bukan cinta biasa
Jika kamu yang menemani
Dan kamu yang temaniku seumur hidupku
Terimalah pengakuanku
This is my confession. :)
Kali ini kusadari
Aku telah jatuh cinta
Dari hatiku terdalam
Sungguh aku cinta padamu
Cintaku bukanlah cinta biasa
Jika kamu yang memiliki
Dan kamu yang temaniku seumur hidupku
Terimalah pengakuanku
Percayalah kepadaku
Semua ini kulakukan
Karena kamu memang untukku
Cinta ku bukan cinta biasa
Jika kamu yang menemani
Dan kamu yang temaniku seumur hidupku
Terimalah pengakuanku
This is my confession. :)
Saturday, July 18, 2009
You Are My Magic Pie- An Euphoria Of Rock n Roll
A written thought of a certain strain of randomness.
Inspired by: Oasis, Magic Pie, 04:15 to 05:13, and staring at a filtered screen.
A taste of tasteless affinity.
A strum of melodious soul.
An endless search of the limitless unlimited.
And here we are standing in this strawBEERy fields.
Running across the rainbow peels.
Casting no shadow nor light.
In the eye of a thousand corridors.
Each with a thousand doors.
Each with a thousand holes to peek.
Hail the curiosity of tainted illusions forever seek.
Indeed as such lies love on a silver screen.
And I do not need marijuanas to be high enough to be in my strawberry fields. It sort of creep into my mind like a sign of a once-hidden time never before climbed. And all I did was take a bite on my magic pie that makes me wanna fly in the sky so high. My magic pie. :)
The more I see the less I know for sure. ~ John Lennon
Just trying to find my Yoko Ono to play on my strawberry swing in the fields that never seen to possess the capsule of time. Time melts. Morning brews. And till then, the sky will always be blue. Then we can sit under the strawberry tree and wander among the dreams of tomorrow. (adapted from The Angel, the Rose and Me)
Im weird. Im told. And I love it.
Now to dwell on my imagination...
Who kicks a hole in the sky, so the heavens will cry over me..
Who stole the soul from the sun, in a world come undone at the seams..
It seems to me the 'Who' is actually a thing. A human heart. Perhaps my view has changed. Humans are walking things. They are the transporter, carrier of the 'thing' that makes them human. But so many people have yet to see it as I do. If they do, perhaps, the world would be a better place for you and for me.
Friday, June 26, 2009
A wish that has been granted
Alhamdulillah! All praises to the Great Omnipotent One, who surpasses time and power, wealth and desire, knowledge and truth!
I am beginning to understand the hidden path beneath my feet in which Allah has set upon for me to plunder my way through the relentless pursuit to Him.
The journey will be long and tiring, and as I hugged my mum, tears welled up, only a spoken truth that was whispered into my ear.
"Oh Allah, grant my son the ease of his burden in his quest for your Love. Grant my son the best of paths in his quest to walk on your Siratul Mustaqim. Grant my son the peace of mind, the strength of tranquility, in his journey to gain knowledge and wisdom, and your Love. And grant all of us a place in Paradise. Amin."
It is in this doa that made me strong. It is in this doa, that I understand and embrace the one fact of life, so important, so highly regarded, until it is mentioned in the Quran so many times.
"The key to Paradise is beneath the feet of your beloved mother."
It is in this makbul doa, that I understand the power of tawaqal. And indeed, Allah has shown His Sight of the Unknown.
I spoke to her. I told her, that I'll make everyone proud. I'll be a hasanah to this family, and the generations beneath me. I'll be a good role model to my brothers, to my cousins, to my children, and my children's children.
So right now, I have a wonderful 6 months to self-reflect. To reposess the spirit to learn. To serve the purpose that was given to me.
Rahmatil lil a'lamin.
"the mercy to all worlds."
Perhaps, even before I step into the realm of Palestine, I should begin my tiny baby steps by focusing on the understanding of knowledge in my society first.
So I am now extending my arms and plead to all. Who shares the same vision as how I envisioned this world to be?
Who shares the same purpose as how I deemed myself to be?
Who shares the same love and compassion as how I am starting to be?
Who shares the same spirit of desire to spread love and knowledge to all worlds as how I am dwelling in to be?
Who shares the same sorrow as how I am facing now?
Who shares the same burden as how I am beginning to feel the weight of the world on my feeble shoulders?
If it is you..
Then I will sincerely say, that you are as special as I am. And because of that, I love you.
Allah huma anna!
I am beginning to understand the hidden path beneath my feet in which Allah has set upon for me to plunder my way through the relentless pursuit to Him.
The journey will be long and tiring, and as I hugged my mum, tears welled up, only a spoken truth that was whispered into my ear.
"Oh Allah, grant my son the ease of his burden in his quest for your Love. Grant my son the best of paths in his quest to walk on your Siratul Mustaqim. Grant my son the peace of mind, the strength of tranquility, in his journey to gain knowledge and wisdom, and your Love. And grant all of us a place in Paradise. Amin."
It is in this doa that made me strong. It is in this doa, that I understand and embrace the one fact of life, so important, so highly regarded, until it is mentioned in the Quran so many times.
"The key to Paradise is beneath the feet of your beloved mother."
It is in this makbul doa, that I understand the power of tawaqal. And indeed, Allah has shown His Sight of the Unknown.
I spoke to her. I told her, that I'll make everyone proud. I'll be a hasanah to this family, and the generations beneath me. I'll be a good role model to my brothers, to my cousins, to my children, and my children's children.
So right now, I have a wonderful 6 months to self-reflect. To reposess the spirit to learn. To serve the purpose that was given to me.
Rahmatil lil a'lamin.
"the mercy to all worlds."
Perhaps, even before I step into the realm of Palestine, I should begin my tiny baby steps by focusing on the understanding of knowledge in my society first.
So I am now extending my arms and plead to all. Who shares the same vision as how I envisioned this world to be?
Who shares the same purpose as how I deemed myself to be?
Who shares the same love and compassion as how I am starting to be?
Who shares the same spirit of desire to spread love and knowledge to all worlds as how I am dwelling in to be?
Who shares the same sorrow as how I am facing now?
Who shares the same burden as how I am beginning to feel the weight of the world on my feeble shoulders?
If it is you..
Then I will sincerely say, that you are as special as I am. And because of that, I love you.
Allah huma anna!
Monday, June 22, 2009
A Masterplan
God has a Masterplan for all of us- be it the living small minuscule ant crawling on the wall, or the huge mountain standing still for thousands of years.
Like how he has a Masterplan for me to be almost late, and test me if I remember Him. I woke up late yesterday, with only 10 min to:
1) clean my room (which I failed to do every day haha)
2) bathe
3) pack my meal for lunch (heng ader mak tolong)
4) iron my working clothes (heng ader mak tolong)
5) dressed up (heng baju dah tergantung)
6) eat breakfast (heng ader mak tolong)
I am totally useless haha!
But I manage to keep it all before 15 min, and tried walking as fast as I could. However, as I was walking, I noticed the sky moving so slow and steady. What ran into my mind was an immediate appreciation of the presence of the Divine, and I prayed to God to help me. And if He were to make me late, then it is ok cause ultimately it was my fault. (however I choose to blame my alarm clock. But no worries now, I have a new one hehe)
And suddenly I walked slowly. And steadily.
At 8.55am sharp, when I just reached the bus stop, the 190 bus came. Alhamdulillah.
There wasn't a traffic jam. Alhamdulillah.
I reached work at 9.20am. Alhamdulillah.
And surely, I was blind. Blinded by His overwhelming power to dictate the course/movement of the universe.
Moral of the story?
Submission to the absolute power of the Omnipotent one, followed by ikhtiar, and then tawaqal. From tawaqal, we redha. And then only we have a peace of mind, knowing that we are in His grace. :)
PS: blushing while laughing is the most cutest attribute a person can ever have :D (this song is for you, kan sedap kan? haha! zaman kekentalan dulu)
oh ya, for my brother samir. This one is for you.
Have you ever wondered?
Why must we serve..
Because we love our land..
And we want it to be free, to be free... YAH!!!
I love those army days... brings back all the memories..
How the seargant f*** me up so hard I almost cried in anguish. How we had to tahan the 8km fast march while fasting..
How we were pumped all the time, even when we are almost booking out...
Can't wait for the next ICT. I am sure I'd enjoy it. But not the carry-the-equipment part la hehe.
Baik CPL Samir. Hehe. Now give me twenty. :p
Like how he has a Masterplan for me to be almost late, and test me if I remember Him. I woke up late yesterday, with only 10 min to:
1) clean my room (which I failed to do every day haha)
2) bathe
3) pack my meal for lunch (heng ader mak tolong)
4) iron my working clothes (heng ader mak tolong)
5) dressed up (heng baju dah tergantung)
6) eat breakfast (heng ader mak tolong)
I am totally useless haha!
But I manage to keep it all before 15 min, and tried walking as fast as I could. However, as I was walking, I noticed the sky moving so slow and steady. What ran into my mind was an immediate appreciation of the presence of the Divine, and I prayed to God to help me. And if He were to make me late, then it is ok cause ultimately it was my fault. (however I choose to blame my alarm clock. But no worries now, I have a new one hehe)
And suddenly I walked slowly. And steadily.
At 8.55am sharp, when I just reached the bus stop, the 190 bus came. Alhamdulillah.
There wasn't a traffic jam. Alhamdulillah.
I reached work at 9.20am. Alhamdulillah.
And surely, I was blind. Blinded by His overwhelming power to dictate the course/movement of the universe.
Moral of the story?
Submission to the absolute power of the Omnipotent one, followed by ikhtiar, and then tawaqal. From tawaqal, we redha. And then only we have a peace of mind, knowing that we are in His grace. :)
PS: blushing while laughing is the most cutest attribute a person can ever have :D (this song is for you, kan sedap kan? haha! zaman kekentalan dulu)
oh ya, for my brother samir. This one is for you.
Have you ever wondered?
Why must we serve..
Because we love our land..
And we want it to be free, to be free... YAH!!!
I love those army days... brings back all the memories..
How the seargant f*** me up so hard I almost cried in anguish. How we had to tahan the 8km fast march while fasting..
How we were pumped all the time, even when we are almost booking out...
Can't wait for the next ICT. I am sure I'd enjoy it. But not the carry-the-equipment part la hehe.
Baik CPL Samir. Hehe. Now give me twenty. :p
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
My Personal Thoughts on the topic 'Longing for the Divine' by Sheikh Hisham Kabbani
I attended the 'Longing for the Divine' seminar hosted by the Naqshbandi-Haqqani Sufi Order, with speaker the wise and gracious Sheikh Hisham Kabbani, chairman of the Islamic Supreme Council of America and the Sufi Muslim Council, and also a disciple of more than 50 years under Sheikh Nazim Al-Qubrusi, Leader of the Naqshbandi-Haqqani Sufi Order. Here is a brief insight into the concepts of what defines to him as 'Longing for the Divine'.
To begin, I would like to share a wonderful poem by Jalaluddin Al-Rumi, famous mystician, sufi, and poet.
I died as a mineral and became a plant,
I died as plant and rose to animal,
I died as animal and I was Man.
Why should I fear? When was I less by dying?
Yet once more I shall die as Man, to soar
With angels bless'd; but even from angelhood
I must pass on: all except God doth perish.
When I have sacrificed my angel-soul,
I shall become what no mind e'er conceived.
Oh, let me not exist!
for Non-existence Proclaims in organ tones,
To Him we shall return.
This poem showed the true purpose of a human being, born into this disillusioned world of fear, pain, and perhaps, lies.
To search for Allah, the Omnipotent One, the Most Gracious, Most Merciful. God of all Gods. God of all Universe.
But do we long for him, or is it actually Him that longs for us?
According to Sheikh Hisham, it is Allah that longs for us. Allah makes it clear in Surah 50 Al Qaf, Verse 16 that: “It was We Who created man, and We know what dark suggestions his soul makes to him: for We are nearer to him than his jugular vein.” This verse illustrates and beautifully explains the position of our relationship and the closeness to our Creator and Him to us which must be realized for our guidance and transformation.
Allah gave us His beloved messengers, to reach out to us, to call us to remember Him, to Love Him. But does that make him dependant on our love? Certainly not.
“God created all things and He is the agent on which all things depend.” (Quran 39:62)
But do remember, that He creates all life, be it matter or non-matter, for a single purpose. To be known. In a Hadis Qudsi, Allah mentioned,
“Kuntu kanzan makhfiyya, fa aradtu an u’raf fa khalaqtu al-khalq" which means, "I am a treasure that is hidden. I seek to be found and thus I create."
Creation is fundamentally the consequence of the divine attribute of being the Creator. A creator who does not create is something of a contradiction in terms. This is not to say that God needs His creation. God is free from all needs. It is creation which needs Him. But, as the greatness of a writer becomes apparent in his writings, the perfection of the divine creative attribute is manifest in creation. Creation in the true sense is unique to God alone. Although humans ascribe the act of creation to themselves, what they do is not true creation. Humankind merely manipulates what already exists - what was already created by God.
And thus, Sheikh Hisham mentions, a few concepts or perhaps, structures, in which we all can achieve that one goal. To long for the divine, as how He longs for us.
The main process in which a human soul must take a paradigm shift to achieve that longing towards the divine would be the process of purification. It is then one can obtain the title 'insan kamil' or pure human. When a human soul possess that desire to change, to move, to illustrate, and perhaps, to soar, few concepts must be applied in order to sustain such flight.
In the Quran, Allah mentioned:
"Rabbana Atina fiddunya hasanataw wa fil Aakhirati hasanataw wa kin adhabannaar."
"Our Lord! Give us good in this world and good in the hereafter, and save us from the punishment of the fire."
Qur'an - Suratul Baqara 2:201
Sheikh Hisham's definition of hasanah, in which many would define it as 'mercy', 'saviour', 'goodness', is simply the Prophet himself, Rasulullah SAW. In the Quran, Allah mention:
"We have only sent you as a mercy to all the worlds." (Surat al-Anbiya': 107)
This word, mercy, can only be referred to our beloved Prophet SAW!! Masya'allah. And thus, it was even mentioned, in the quran, 33:56-
"Surely, Allah and His angels send blessings to the Prophet. O you who believe, do pray Allah to bless him, and send your Salam (prayer for his being in peace) to him in abundance."
Thus, the definition of hasanah is in fact the potrayal of obedience and love for our Mualim. It is in him, Muhammad pbuh, that we need to confer in order to gain that longing for Allah. It is in this certain unique man, this Habibullah, that we need to love in order to be loved by Allah. And thus, we need to salawat as much as we can. Show the akhlak as exemplified by the Prophet himself. Do volunteer work, and hold obedience to his teachings. He holds the key to Allah's grace.
Hasanah is actually the syafa'ah given by Allah through the Prophet Muhammad. It is thus, encouraged among us, to salawah as much as we can, so that in yaumul kiamah, on Allah's will, we are able to receive Muhammad's (pbuh) syafa'ah.
Sheikh Hisham mentioned about the ritualistic act of obedience to Allah that must be accompanied by the essence of sincerity. He related his idea with a example from the sirah of Rabiatul Adawiyah. After her husband died, she relentlessly prayed to Allah, gave up dunia in search of Allah's grace. It is in her total obedience that worried the ulamas at that time. This was because she is a widowed, and they urged her to be married, for security reasons. She affirmly declined, stating that she do not have time for marriages. Simply because she feels her istighfar is not enough. When asked why, she simply mentioned that her first istighfar is not sincere, so she istighfar again, and she then feels that her second istighfar is not as sincere as the first, and thus she istighfar again, and still she feels it is not sincere enough.
Therefore, sincerity must be the major factor in any rituals that we do in our daily lives, in order to achieve that longing for Allah.
Tasawuf is actually a derivation of the word, 'suf' meaning pure, or clear. Sheikh Hisham encourages us to learn to punish our hearts, and reflect ourselves infront of the mirror, on the things we have done, internally and externally. Self-reflection holds the power to soften our raging hearts, diminishing every flames of earthly desire. Henceforth, we need to educate our hearts, keep telling them not to rebel.
Concept of Conspire
This is an obstacle. According to Sheikh Hisham, one who conspire and backstabbing another ummah will be the biggest obstacle in the path towards Allah. He mentioned about how a man in yaumul kiamah, who was oppressed by another man. The opressed then complains to Allah, and thus Allah the Most Just took away the opressor's good deeds and gave to the opressed. Still, the opressed is not satisfied. Thus Allah took away his bad deeds and gave to the opressor. And Allah asked, is this enough? Are you satisfied? The opressed thus was satisfied. Allah ordered him to forgive the opressor. And after the opressed forgave that sinned man, Allah said, "Do you think that you are more merciful than I am? I forgive this sinned man, and put him in Paradise."
Masya'allah!
However, one must realised that if you do bad things to God, He is All Merciful and will forgive you, but if you do bad things to a fellow human, you must ask forgiveness from the person. And as the person's mercy is limited, thus it is important for all to consider the effects of Hablum minan nas. The relationship from man to man is thus, imperative in our journey.
A person from the crowd posed a question regarding the Sheikh's perspective on Jalaludin Al-rumi's theory of uplifiting.
Sheikh Hisham explained in terms of metaphysics.
In this world and more, everything is moving. From the largest celestial body, to the tiniest atom. Moving at a certain speed. Some constant. Others going faster. Others decelerating. But the question to ponder would be, where are we heading?
Movement, thus, is an attribute of a creation, drawing closer towards the Perfect One, Allah the Mighty. But then, another question would surface. How do we make ourselves, body and soul, all moving towards a unified path?
If we are able to do so, the amount of energy possessed by the person is a strong as an atom. The smaller, the faster the electrons circulating around an axis, the stronger the intermolecular forces of attraction. And since according to Newton, energy cannot be created, it can be converted, thus, this energy, constant as the Omnipotent, can be converted. As we make ourselves smaller, shedding our earthly desires, our mind, our flesh, and leaving nothing but Allah's existence, then our energy is directed to a unified path to the divine.
It is thus said, that a quiet humble man proves more powerful and mysterious, than a loud mouthed man.
It is imperative for us to accept that a creation's attribute is that, he is dependant on another creation. Sheikh Hisham mentioned that sustaining a healthy relationship between your parents, your neighbours, your family, your friends, and the ummah as a whole is another factor to gain divinity. By helping one another, smiling, donating, sharing, and more, we not only help our community to grow healthy, but also to educate our heart to have ikhsan. Ikhsan can be defined in many forms; through akhlak, amar makruf, nahi mungkar etc. It can be with just a smile. It can be by loving one another.
Sheikh Hisham stressed the importance of love. Love can be a simple word, but a person can also view it in a sophisticated way. And yet, although love come in many mannerisms, love is still love. It is in the understanding, feelings, communication, and then the actions that we do. A lot of people misunderstood this word. Many of them confers this to just feelings. But it is more. If a person loves another person because of feelings, than it is not love. But if a person loves another person on the basis of understanding the needs, the holistic character, the personality, the will, the knowledge, and the sincerity of the person, than it is more than love.
I remember embracing myself, with red eyes and wet cheeks, hoping to catch a glimpse of myself amidst the tyranny of my own monster. The notion in which the Sheikh shared to us, was simply God-send. Indeed, if you were to prepare it with a paper and a pen, it would be, as mentioned by the Sheikh, as the egoistical personality that would be talking. But if it was not prepared, perhaps, or maybe, it is the heart that speaks.
And indeed my heart was talking and communing. I find myself in peace. Having that knowledge of God as the One, and always depending on him, conferring to him for help and mercy, I am suddenly transported into a dimension whereby I feel I am me.
Sheikh Hisham mentioned about sacrifices. About how this longing does not come cheap. I wonder how much more must I sacrifice to attain this love.
But ultimately, alhamdulilah, I feel I am becoming a better man. May God bless us all, amin!
PS: Mun'ish was a success! (as how we logistic peeps would have seen it haha) cause i think we did our part very well, having all the things required. I would like to thank all for the support. And hope that the passion to serve to the community does not die out. Cuz I am certain mine won't. :) insya'allah!
And to my very best friend, Samir Syirazi. You went through all the ups and downs. And like a loyal soldier, you stood beside me despite my occasional 'sarjan-like' attitude that might have irritated you. Thank you my friend. I hope Allah put you in His Grace, and I hope when you're there in yaumul kiamah, trying to save 70 people to Paradise, please do not forget to save me. For I am certain I won't forget to save you. :)
To Nabila, for always giving me the positivity in this quest. I do not know why, but somehow or rather, I felt you were more stronger than me. It is not in the strength, but perhaps, your will in the path of sincerity that makes you one of the strongest female personnel I have ever witnessed. I hope this won't end here aite. :)
To my logistic team, Ahmad, Akmal and Fiqa, who stood beside me together as one, always willing to take the next step, and without fail, you have surprised me everytime with the achievements we did together as a team. We were like Santa Clause that day. Who says we lack teamwork???? :p rubbish!
To all the uncles and aunties that I have broken the amanah, I hope you peeps forgive me. Goodness, i still feel guilty for scraping alot of stuff. It was like, we gave you an economic hope, and then, we took it back. Of course you are all disappointed. So am I. So I hope you are all blessed.
To my Mun'ish representatives; Ustaz, Fad, Mai, Azmi, Awis, Amalina and many more. We were great. The collaboration was a success. See you in a few hours! I heard Amalina nak kasi kiter surprise. I tried to dig from her, tapi she is a really tough nut. Hahahaha! Nanti2, I kasi u Abg Ezra, confirm you blang kiter semuer hehe.
To my dearest mum and dad, who has continued to support me in this event. There were many issues that we did together as a family. I am very proud of all of us. May all of us be in His Blessings. And Happy Birthday Dad!!!!! :D
Now I can relax with my 'wife' or shud I say, my guitar. Hahahaha!
Next up, DANCING!!!!!! My adventure will never end. :p
To begin, I would like to share a wonderful poem by Jalaluddin Al-Rumi, famous mystician, sufi, and poet.
I died as a mineral and became a plant,
I died as plant and rose to animal,
I died as animal and I was Man.
Why should I fear? When was I less by dying?
Yet once more I shall die as Man, to soar
With angels bless'd; but even from angelhood
I must pass on: all except God doth perish.
When I have sacrificed my angel-soul,
I shall become what no mind e'er conceived.
Oh, let me not exist!
for Non-existence Proclaims in organ tones,
To Him we shall return.
This poem showed the true purpose of a human being, born into this disillusioned world of fear, pain, and perhaps, lies.
To search for Allah, the Omnipotent One, the Most Gracious, Most Merciful. God of all Gods. God of all Universe.
But do we long for him, or is it actually Him that longs for us?
According to Sheikh Hisham, it is Allah that longs for us. Allah makes it clear in Surah 50 Al Qaf, Verse 16 that: “It was We Who created man, and We know what dark suggestions his soul makes to him: for We are nearer to him than his jugular vein.” This verse illustrates and beautifully explains the position of our relationship and the closeness to our Creator and Him to us which must be realized for our guidance and transformation.
Allah gave us His beloved messengers, to reach out to us, to call us to remember Him, to Love Him. But does that make him dependant on our love? Certainly not.
“God created all things and He is the agent on which all things depend.” (Quran 39:62)
But do remember, that He creates all life, be it matter or non-matter, for a single purpose. To be known. In a Hadis Qudsi, Allah mentioned,
“Kuntu kanzan makhfiyya, fa aradtu an u’raf fa khalaqtu al-khalq" which means, "I am a treasure that is hidden. I seek to be found and thus I create."
Creation is fundamentally the consequence of the divine attribute of being the Creator. A creator who does not create is something of a contradiction in terms. This is not to say that God needs His creation. God is free from all needs. It is creation which needs Him. But, as the greatness of a writer becomes apparent in his writings, the perfection of the divine creative attribute is manifest in creation. Creation in the true sense is unique to God alone. Although humans ascribe the act of creation to themselves, what they do is not true creation. Humankind merely manipulates what already exists - what was already created by God.
And thus, Sheikh Hisham mentions, a few concepts or perhaps, structures, in which we all can achieve that one goal. To long for the divine, as how He longs for us.
The main process in which a human soul must take a paradigm shift to achieve that longing towards the divine would be the process of purification. It is then one can obtain the title 'insan kamil' or pure human. When a human soul possess that desire to change, to move, to illustrate, and perhaps, to soar, few concepts must be applied in order to sustain such flight.
Concept of Hasanah
In the Quran, Allah mentioned:
"Rabbana Atina fiddunya hasanataw wa fil Aakhirati hasanataw wa kin adhabannaar."
"Our Lord! Give us good in this world and good in the hereafter, and save us from the punishment of the fire."
Qur'an - Suratul Baqara 2:201
Sheikh Hisham's definition of hasanah, in which many would define it as 'mercy', 'saviour', 'goodness', is simply the Prophet himself, Rasulullah SAW. In the Quran, Allah mention:
"We have only sent you as a mercy to all the worlds." (Surat al-Anbiya': 107)
This word, mercy, can only be referred to our beloved Prophet SAW!! Masya'allah. And thus, it was even mentioned, in the quran, 33:56-
"Surely, Allah and His angels send blessings to the Prophet. O you who believe, do pray Allah to bless him, and send your Salam (prayer for his being in peace) to him in abundance."
Thus, the definition of hasanah is in fact the potrayal of obedience and love for our Mualim. It is in him, Muhammad pbuh, that we need to confer in order to gain that longing for Allah. It is in this certain unique man, this Habibullah, that we need to love in order to be loved by Allah. And thus, we need to salawat as much as we can. Show the akhlak as exemplified by the Prophet himself. Do volunteer work, and hold obedience to his teachings. He holds the key to Allah's grace.
Hasanah is actually the syafa'ah given by Allah through the Prophet Muhammad. It is thus, encouraged among us, to salawah as much as we can, so that in yaumul kiamah, on Allah's will, we are able to receive Muhammad's (pbuh) syafa'ah.
Concept of Ikhlas
Sheikh Hisham mentioned about the ritualistic act of obedience to Allah that must be accompanied by the essence of sincerity. He related his idea with a example from the sirah of Rabiatul Adawiyah. After her husband died, she relentlessly prayed to Allah, gave up dunia in search of Allah's grace. It is in her total obedience that worried the ulamas at that time. This was because she is a widowed, and they urged her to be married, for security reasons. She affirmly declined, stating that she do not have time for marriages. Simply because she feels her istighfar is not enough. When asked why, she simply mentioned that her first istighfar is not sincere, so she istighfar again, and she then feels that her second istighfar is not as sincere as the first, and thus she istighfar again, and still she feels it is not sincere enough.
Therefore, sincerity must be the major factor in any rituals that we do in our daily lives, in order to achieve that longing for Allah.
Concept of Reflection
Tasawuf is actually a derivation of the word, 'suf' meaning pure, or clear. Sheikh Hisham encourages us to learn to punish our hearts, and reflect ourselves infront of the mirror, on the things we have done, internally and externally. Self-reflection holds the power to soften our raging hearts, diminishing every flames of earthly desire. Henceforth, we need to educate our hearts, keep telling them not to rebel.
Concept of Conspire
This is an obstacle. According to Sheikh Hisham, one who conspire and backstabbing another ummah will be the biggest obstacle in the path towards Allah. He mentioned about how a man in yaumul kiamah, who was oppressed by another man. The opressed then complains to Allah, and thus Allah the Most Just took away the opressor's good deeds and gave to the opressed. Still, the opressed is not satisfied. Thus Allah took away his bad deeds and gave to the opressor. And Allah asked, is this enough? Are you satisfied? The opressed thus was satisfied. Allah ordered him to forgive the opressor. And after the opressed forgave that sinned man, Allah said, "Do you think that you are more merciful than I am? I forgive this sinned man, and put him in Paradise."
Masya'allah!
However, one must realised that if you do bad things to God, He is All Merciful and will forgive you, but if you do bad things to a fellow human, you must ask forgiveness from the person. And as the person's mercy is limited, thus it is important for all to consider the effects of Hablum minan nas. The relationship from man to man is thus, imperative in our journey.
Concept of Movement
A person from the crowd posed a question regarding the Sheikh's perspective on Jalaludin Al-rumi's theory of uplifiting.
Sheikh Hisham explained in terms of metaphysics.
In this world and more, everything is moving. From the largest celestial body, to the tiniest atom. Moving at a certain speed. Some constant. Others going faster. Others decelerating. But the question to ponder would be, where are we heading?
Movement, thus, is an attribute of a creation, drawing closer towards the Perfect One, Allah the Mighty. But then, another question would surface. How do we make ourselves, body and soul, all moving towards a unified path?
If we are able to do so, the amount of energy possessed by the person is a strong as an atom. The smaller, the faster the electrons circulating around an axis, the stronger the intermolecular forces of attraction. And since according to Newton, energy cannot be created, it can be converted, thus, this energy, constant as the Omnipotent, can be converted. As we make ourselves smaller, shedding our earthly desires, our mind, our flesh, and leaving nothing but Allah's existence, then our energy is directed to a unified path to the divine.
It is thus said, that a quiet humble man proves more powerful and mysterious, than a loud mouthed man.
Concept of Interaction
It is imperative for us to accept that a creation's attribute is that, he is dependant on another creation. Sheikh Hisham mentioned that sustaining a healthy relationship between your parents, your neighbours, your family, your friends, and the ummah as a whole is another factor to gain divinity. By helping one another, smiling, donating, sharing, and more, we not only help our community to grow healthy, but also to educate our heart to have ikhsan. Ikhsan can be defined in many forms; through akhlak, amar makruf, nahi mungkar etc. It can be with just a smile. It can be by loving one another.
Sheikh Hisham stressed the importance of love. Love can be a simple word, but a person can also view it in a sophisticated way. And yet, although love come in many mannerisms, love is still love. It is in the understanding, feelings, communication, and then the actions that we do. A lot of people misunderstood this word. Many of them confers this to just feelings. But it is more. If a person loves another person because of feelings, than it is not love. But if a person loves another person on the basis of understanding the needs, the holistic character, the personality, the will, the knowledge, and the sincerity of the person, than it is more than love.
My Personal Thoughts
I remember embracing myself, with red eyes and wet cheeks, hoping to catch a glimpse of myself amidst the tyranny of my own monster. The notion in which the Sheikh shared to us, was simply God-send. Indeed, if you were to prepare it with a paper and a pen, it would be, as mentioned by the Sheikh, as the egoistical personality that would be talking. But if it was not prepared, perhaps, or maybe, it is the heart that speaks.
And indeed my heart was talking and communing. I find myself in peace. Having that knowledge of God as the One, and always depending on him, conferring to him for help and mercy, I am suddenly transported into a dimension whereby I feel I am me.
Sheikh Hisham mentioned about sacrifices. About how this longing does not come cheap. I wonder how much more must I sacrifice to attain this love.
But ultimately, alhamdulilah, I feel I am becoming a better man. May God bless us all, amin!
PS: Mun'ish was a success! (as how we logistic peeps would have seen it haha) cause i think we did our part very well, having all the things required. I would like to thank all for the support. And hope that the passion to serve to the community does not die out. Cuz I am certain mine won't. :) insya'allah!
And to my very best friend, Samir Syirazi. You went through all the ups and downs. And like a loyal soldier, you stood beside me despite my occasional 'sarjan-like' attitude that might have irritated you. Thank you my friend. I hope Allah put you in His Grace, and I hope when you're there in yaumul kiamah, trying to save 70 people to Paradise, please do not forget to save me. For I am certain I won't forget to save you. :)
To Nabila, for always giving me the positivity in this quest. I do not know why, but somehow or rather, I felt you were more stronger than me. It is not in the strength, but perhaps, your will in the path of sincerity that makes you one of the strongest female personnel I have ever witnessed. I hope this won't end here aite. :)
To my logistic team, Ahmad, Akmal and Fiqa, who stood beside me together as one, always willing to take the next step, and without fail, you have surprised me everytime with the achievements we did together as a team. We were like Santa Clause that day. Who says we lack teamwork???? :p rubbish!
To all the uncles and aunties that I have broken the amanah, I hope you peeps forgive me. Goodness, i still feel guilty for scraping alot of stuff. It was like, we gave you an economic hope, and then, we took it back. Of course you are all disappointed. So am I. So I hope you are all blessed.
To my Mun'ish representatives; Ustaz, Fad, Mai, Azmi, Awis, Amalina and many more. We were great. The collaboration was a success. See you in a few hours! I heard Amalina nak kasi kiter surprise. I tried to dig from her, tapi she is a really tough nut. Hahahaha! Nanti2, I kasi u Abg Ezra, confirm you blang kiter semuer hehe.
To my dearest mum and dad, who has continued to support me in this event. There were many issues that we did together as a family. I am very proud of all of us. May all of us be in His Blessings. And Happy Birthday Dad!!!!! :D
Now I can relax with my 'wife' or shud I say, my guitar. Hahahaha!
Next up, DANCING!!!!!! My adventure will never end. :p
Tuesday, June 09, 2009
a question.
An excerpt from a novel yet to be published, "The Rose, the Angel, and Me."
I tried to place myself in a world without fear, without pain, and an alarming piece of jigsaw from a time without space nor gateway to relinquish the evil of men.
And as I sat in that dimension, eyes shut so tight, lips sealed like a kiss of death, I saw a green meadow with a garden of fresh fluer de liu, rasberries and morning dews. The trees were covered with Sundus of great mellow.
I opened my eyes and asked the Angel, who was staring at me with that alluring eyes of hers.
"Is it true that every men who yearns the pandora box of life must go through a path of solitude?"
The Angel, despite the unclear sky of doubt that was hovering above us, took my heart from that space and asked me," What does your heart says?"
I looked at the heart that was beating with a rythmn of relentless serenity. It was sparkling. I hold the beating heart close to my ear and asked, "What is the answer?"
The heart kept beating. There wasn't an answer.
Impatient, I asked the Angel again, "Is it true, that every.."
The Angel interrupted me with a smile.
"If you are not ready for an answer, then let it be. Just continue to close your eyes. And let it be. Just continue to walk. And let it be. Just continue to embrace. And let it be. Just continue to love. And let it be."
I chuckled at the last statement.
She took my hand and shook it.
"What was that for?", I asked.
She smiled, almost like a silent whisper,"Love is a mystery. Up on the silver screen. All in good time."
~~~
I pondered at her words as I saw the Angel blew the clouds of doubts away that grew storms of discontent.
All in good time.
Then I knew.
And so I prayed, arms wide open.
"Oh Lord of the Universe, have mercy, and give me the patience to seek the answers."
It is not until then, that I knew, it was not up to me to decide upon the questions, nor put judgement on the actions of what I desire. It was never up to me, nor people, not even the Angel. It was just Him. The Omnipotent One.
I think I am not ready. But my heart says differently. I leave it to God to make that decision. :)
Marry me Juliet.
I tried to place myself in a world without fear, without pain, and an alarming piece of jigsaw from a time without space nor gateway to relinquish the evil of men.
And as I sat in that dimension, eyes shut so tight, lips sealed like a kiss of death, I saw a green meadow with a garden of fresh fluer de liu, rasberries and morning dews. The trees were covered with Sundus of great mellow.
I opened my eyes and asked the Angel, who was staring at me with that alluring eyes of hers.
"Is it true that every men who yearns the pandora box of life must go through a path of solitude?"
The Angel, despite the unclear sky of doubt that was hovering above us, took my heart from that space and asked me," What does your heart says?"
I looked at the heart that was beating with a rythmn of relentless serenity. It was sparkling. I hold the beating heart close to my ear and asked, "What is the answer?"
The heart kept beating. There wasn't an answer.
Impatient, I asked the Angel again, "Is it true, that every.."
The Angel interrupted me with a smile.
"If you are not ready for an answer, then let it be. Just continue to close your eyes. And let it be. Just continue to walk. And let it be. Just continue to embrace. And let it be. Just continue to love. And let it be."
I chuckled at the last statement.
She took my hand and shook it.
"What was that for?", I asked.
She smiled, almost like a silent whisper,"Love is a mystery. Up on the silver screen. All in good time."
~~~
I pondered at her words as I saw the Angel blew the clouds of doubts away that grew storms of discontent.
All in good time.
Then I knew.
And so I prayed, arms wide open.
"Oh Lord of the Universe, have mercy, and give me the patience to seek the answers."
It is not until then, that I knew, it was not up to me to decide upon the questions, nor put judgement on the actions of what I desire. It was never up to me, nor people, not even the Angel. It was just Him. The Omnipotent One.
I think I am not ready. But my heart says differently. I leave it to God to make that decision. :)
Marry me Juliet.
Saturday, June 06, 2009
God-conscious
Past few days were a bitch.
With all the commotion of Logistics doing more than they are supposed to, I wonder why I even sign up for this.
Although I must admit I went in with only God as a purpose of salvation.
I remember overhearing my mum advising her students while I was on the com yesterday.
"God will test the ones He deem to be God-Conscious."
and
"Sedangkan orang mukmin akan berkata, Ya Allah, kenapa dikau tidak memberiku ujian? Adakah kau tidak mencintaiku lagi?"
I try to place my heart among the mukmins who are not scared of the likes of dunia.
It was a peaceful retreat.
And soon after Allah gave me solutions, hopes, and strength. I was red-eyed nearly the whole day at work upon seeing His undying Love for those who are patient. I placed all my fingers and pointed it back at me, and told God, that I do not deserve all this for I am sinned.
I love you ma.
I still remember the words you whispered in my ear before I left to work with a restored spiritual uplift.
"Setiap ujian ada hikmahnyer. Sebagai keluarga kita harus mengahdapi semua dengan hati yang ikhlas dan reda. Hanya dengan ujian Allah, kita mampu tahu bahwa Allah tetap mencintai kita. Mama doa agar semua anak2 mama mendapat kesenangan dalam menghadapi ujian Allah."
Alquran, surah Al-Insyirah, verse 4-5.
"So indeed with hardship is ease. Indeed with hardship is ease."
God himself has promised that. It is up to me to believe. And I believe you, oh God of the universe and beyond.
Something for me to ponder..
Here's a thought for every man
Who tries to understand what is in his hands
He walks along the open road of Love & Life
surviving if he can
Bound with all the weight of all the words he tried to say
Chained to all the places that he never wished to say
Bound with all the weight of all the words he tried to say
and as faced the sun he cast no shadow
As they took his soul they stole his pride
As they took his soul they stole his pride
As they took his soul they stole his pride
Here's a thought for every man
Who tries to understand what is in his hands
He walks along the open road of Love & Life
surviving if he can
Bound with all the weight of all the words he tried to say
Chained to all the places that he never wished to say
Bound with all the weight of all the words he tried to say
and as faced the sun he cast no shadow
As they took his soul they stole his pride
As they took his soul they stole his pride
As they took his soul they stole his pride
And as he faced the sun he cast no shadow
With all the commotion of Logistics doing more than they are supposed to, I wonder why I even sign up for this.
Although I must admit I went in with only God as a purpose of salvation.
I remember overhearing my mum advising her students while I was on the com yesterday.
"God will test the ones He deem to be God-Conscious."
and
"Sedangkan orang mukmin akan berkata, Ya Allah, kenapa dikau tidak memberiku ujian? Adakah kau tidak mencintaiku lagi?"
I try to place my heart among the mukmins who are not scared of the likes of dunia.
It was a peaceful retreat.
And soon after Allah gave me solutions, hopes, and strength. I was red-eyed nearly the whole day at work upon seeing His undying Love for those who are patient. I placed all my fingers and pointed it back at me, and told God, that I do not deserve all this for I am sinned.
I love you ma.
I still remember the words you whispered in my ear before I left to work with a restored spiritual uplift.
"Setiap ujian ada hikmahnyer. Sebagai keluarga kita harus mengahdapi semua dengan hati yang ikhlas dan reda. Hanya dengan ujian Allah, kita mampu tahu bahwa Allah tetap mencintai kita. Mama doa agar semua anak2 mama mendapat kesenangan dalam menghadapi ujian Allah."
Alquran, surah Al-Insyirah, verse 4-5.
"So indeed with hardship is ease. Indeed with hardship is ease."
God himself has promised that. It is up to me to believe. And I believe you, oh God of the universe and beyond.
Something for me to ponder..
Here's a thought for every man
Who tries to understand what is in his hands
He walks along the open road of Love & Life
surviving if he can
Bound with all the weight of all the words he tried to say
Chained to all the places that he never wished to say
Bound with all the weight of all the words he tried to say
and as faced the sun he cast no shadow
As they took his soul they stole his pride
As they took his soul they stole his pride
As they took his soul they stole his pride
Here's a thought for every man
Who tries to understand what is in his hands
He walks along the open road of Love & Life
surviving if he can
Bound with all the weight of all the words he tried to say
Chained to all the places that he never wished to say
Bound with all the weight of all the words he tried to say
and as faced the sun he cast no shadow
As they took his soul they stole his pride
As they took his soul they stole his pride
As they took his soul they stole his pride
And as he faced the sun he cast no shadow
Monday, May 25, 2009
Haki, or himma 'aliyya
What does it take to sacrifice and protect your 'nakama'?What does it take to be the best in the world?
What does it take to protect your dreams and ambitions?
The ans?
HAKI (覇気)
~willpower, ambition, drive, aspiration
On the authority of Abu Huraia ( may Allah be pleased with him ) that the Prophet ( may the blessings and peace of Allah be upon him ) said :
" Whosoever removes a worldly grief from a believer, Allah will remove for him one of the griefs of the Day of Judgment. Whosoever alleviates (the lot of ) a need person, Allah will alleviate ( his lot) in this world and the next. Whosoever shields a Muslim, Allah will shield him in this world and the next. Allah will aid a servant (of His) so long as the servant aids his brother. Whosoever follows a path to seek knowledge therein, Allah will make easy for him path to Paradise. No people gather together in one of the houses of Allah, reciting the Book of Allah and studying it among themselves, without tranquility descending upon them, mercy enveloping them, the angels surrounding them and Allah making mention of them amongst those who are with him. whosoever is slowed down by his actions will not be hastened foreword by his lineage .."
The Sufi way exists to know the incommensurability of the Divine. To do so the self must relinquish its position as the greatest thing in existence. Belief in the inevitability of destiny anticipates this in principle before one realizes it in the fullness of one’s path.
The context of this maxim is personal transformation from spiritual hypocrisy to spiritual sincerity (to fully submit to the Lord's will, and in doing so, we submit without asking anything in return).
Masters of the path are unanimous that to accomplish the change the aspirant must have high ambition (himma ‘aliyya), but it must be sublimated so that it becomes second nature; practiced and not thought about; there, but never looked at or depended upon.
Our own will is one of the plainest components of consciousness, and the desire to ascend to the Divine in a moment is probably native to every heart that has ever set out for Him. But the distance of the path lies precisely in realizing the ontological relation between our own contingent being and the necessary being of Allah, and if reaching God were subject to our will, it would not be subject to His, which is the opposite of illumination. The spiritual way must purify the traveller, by its very turns and length, of the illusion of being “master of his fate and captain of his soul,” in order to allow him to directly experience the divine omnipotence.
Allah says in a hadith qudsi,
“Man offends Me: he reviles Time, though I am Time; the command is in My hand, I turn over the nights and days.”
In conclusion?
Ikhtiar and Tawaqal. :)
PS: I personally believe by sleeping 11 hours it totally eliminates fatigue. I slept 11 hours yesterday right after work and solat isyak. Now look at me. I feel like Captain Planet. Powerla!
Friday, May 22, 2009
I wish I can go for an adventure, right now.
Quit whatever Im doing ryt now. Screw uni. Screw DFS.
Just take up my lucky running shoes, some money, and run.
Keep running and see the world. Who knows people might follow me. And then more people.
I'll sleep somewhere, anywhere. Just need a credit card. And run. It'll be a the most dangerous and adventurous journey in my whole life, worth dying for.
After so many nights, the constellations are finally in place. I saw my star today. My star. Unfortunately, you are not there to see it too.
Quit whatever Im doing ryt now. Screw uni. Screw DFS.
Just take up my lucky running shoes, some money, and run.
Keep running and see the world. Who knows people might follow me. And then more people.
I'll sleep somewhere, anywhere. Just need a credit card. And run. It'll be a the most dangerous and adventurous journey in my whole life, worth dying for.
After so many nights, the constellations are finally in place. I saw my star today. My star. Unfortunately, you are not there to see it too.
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